My oldest son is developmentally in the stage of collecting. He loves to keep brochures, ticket stubs, and even his deposit slips when we take his piggy to the bank. He keeps all his stuffed animals and books surrounding his head on his bed and keeps his cars and trains lined up so when he’s ready to play with them, they are, too. Decluttering toys is not at the forefront of his mind. He isn’t itching to get into his room and say good-bye to his used-to-be-favorites. He is perfectly happy keeping every single thing in his room because if you ask him, they are all his favorite. But, being around 29 years older than him with a little life experience behind me, I know if they are all his favorite things than none of them can be his favorite things.
Part of my job as a parent is to instruct, guide, and give experiences so my littles can learn how to navigate this life. It’s gently nudging them in the direction of being a happy, kind, polite, loving human. My purpose as a parent is to love them and within that love comes a desire to guide them on life’s journey.
Just like we teach our kids how to brush their teeth, to look both ways before crossing the street, and to not pick their noses (why is it so hard??), Kevin and I have chosen to teach our babes about living with enough. We are on a journey here, we have not yet arrived, so we give ourselves a lot of grace. One of the ways we are teaching them about living with enough is to do a regular toy declutter.
Do toys seem to replicate themselves in your home? We are past Christmas and still things seem to grow feet and wander into our playroom and toy bins. Kevin and I don’t buy a lot of toys, but somehow they accumulate from outside sources over the course of a few months. So, usually after a holiday or birthday or even a change of season, we will go through and do a good declutter. A declutter is different than a purge. If you are looking to do a big purge, check out this post. Today is all about a quick 15-30 minute toy declutter, preferably with your kids.
I will be transparent, this is not the most anticipated event for our oldest, Luke. He loves his things, but he knows when I say we need to find some things to donate, it’s happening whether he likes it or not. Please don’t misread me, my children don’t live with barren walls with a single toy car sitting on their dresser. They are not lacking in the toy department, but still, letting go can be hard, especially when it’s being learned.
The first time we did a toy declutter, it was a bit painful. There were no tears, but there was push-back and my kids are all under five. There could have been whining involved, but in the end the declutter was completed, toys were donated, and since then every toy declutter has gotten a bit easier. So a heads up: Your first toy declutter will not be easy if you’re including your kids.
Okay let’s get down to it:
How to do a Toy Declutter
1. Decide if you will involve your kids.
Before you begin, decide if your kids will be involved or if they will sit on the sidelines. If they are under three, I think it’s best to do it yourself. Kids under three aren’t going to get much out of it. However, if your kids are over the age of three, I think it’s a great learning experience for them to be involved with the process.
2. Tell your kids you are going to do a toy declutter.
Your first toy declutter could involve some whining and questions, but know it will get easier. Explain to your kids other children could get use out of the toys they no longer play with or use. Maybe they have a younger cousin or friend they could gift the unused toys to or maybe the donation box is the way to go. Churches, daycares, and schools are other great places for gently used toys.
3. Start small.
Ask your kids to find a certain number of toys to donate or give to another child. I suggest starting with 3-5 items or if you have an over abundance of toys, maybe you can start with more. They will need a lot of guidance here. Have them look for toys they no longer play with or fish out any broken toys. If there are toys you are hoping will make an exit, you can make suggestions.
One thing I learned is to try and always honor things they choose to let go, within reason. If a child wants to give away a car you gave them for Christmas and it’s February, question them a bit, but if they’re adamant, let them make the choice. Obviously if they choose something they play with often, remind them of that and then go from there. Reasoning with toddlers and little kids is not easy, but remind yourself you are doing this to teach them as well as keep yourself sane.
4. Celebrate
You did it! They did it! Praise your kids for being generous and allowing other kids to get use out of the toys they no longer use. If it’s their first time, consider doing something special like having ice cream after dinner or letting them play at the park an extra ten minutes. Wrap the declutter up on a positive note.
Showing our kids how to be generous and grateful for the things we have is a lesson worth teaching. Decluttering the toys is a win for everyone involved. Put it on your calendar and make it a new family rhythm that comes with the seasons.
I would love to know…how do you declutter the toys in your home?