A Simpler Motherhood

Getting Away with Girlfriends

Stomach pains extend from one side of my body to the other while my vision blurs from the tears streaming down my face.  My eardrums vibrate and it’s hard to catch my breath as my head falls back against the headrest of the car seat.

I am laughing: uncontrollably, fearlessly, freely.  I am in the car driving from Dallas to Waco with five friends after dining at one of those hipster places which boasted and delivered humble hospitality with a free glass of wine served at sunset.  I look to my left as my water drinking friend steers us in the right direction.  She gracefully laughs at the beautiful nonsense in the backseat while simultaneously keeping us safe.  Our conversation lands on dolphins then husbands and back to dolphins.  Our trip could have been over then and there and we would have grown closer and had stories to tell.

But it didn’t.  The next day we experienced the pride of Waco: Chip and Jo’s Silos.  And it was all ‘they’ say it is.  Lunch was had at the food trucks and then we stopped at Target, which felt like home, to pick up supplies.  After a winding trip down to Austin, we arrived at the ‘lake’ house planted about a mile from the lake.  We ate dinner and listened to music by the water as our server mocked us in the sweetest way.

Our final day was spent watching football and preparing for the climax: The Happy Hour with Jamie Ivey.  A Jesus loving podcaster we all adore puts on a party and we showed up for it.  And I’m so glad we did.  The night couldn’t have turned out better with the best seats in the barn, an immeasurable amount of laughing, drinks and dinner, listening, learning, and processing the ins and outs of this life; together.  We won’t discuss the next day because it was spent in the car, all 13 hours of it.  But, it was still full of good conversation, lots of laughs, and plenty of time to just be (in the car) together.

getting away with girlfriends

This getaway with girlfriends I described was not only fun, but life giving, inspiring, and I couldn’t help but love my friends even more.  Before the trip I knew girlfriends were important; but after…well, even more so.

I will hang my hat on this: Getting away with girlfriends is good,life-giving,and important.

I look at my time in Dallas, Waco, and Austin as investing in relationships and people who will carry me, encourage me, and love me through my marriage and my motherhood.  Those four days I took time to be present with the ones I choose to do life with week to week.

This isn’t my first girlfriends trip.  I have had some pretty great ones in the past and I hope to continue to travel and be with the friends I love.  But these trips don’t happen on their own.  They take time, planning, lots of preparation, and a husband or family rallying to make it come to fruition.

Saying Yes.

We started planning this trip six months ago after going to another event together.  And I found the first step is saying ‘yes’; saying ‘yes’ to the travel, the expense, the time, the hassle and hardship of being gone from family.  It’s probably the hardest part.

After getting past saying ‘yes’, the rest is planning, preparing and asking for a lot of favors.  And every single minute I spent on those things was worth it.  I know these words are making getting away with girlfriends seem easy, but I entirely understand that it is anything but.

getting away with girlfriends

Not every time I get away with girlfriends looks like driving in the car for 12 hours and attending a big ‘ol party.  Not even close.  Many times it looks like an afternoon at a friend’s home without distractions or an overnight stay in a hotel where we order take out (and sit in our comfy clothes and sip wine).  Other times it looks like a concert together or a baby shower.  Getting away with girlfriends doesn’t always equal four days away or even four hours away.

It merely entails intentionality, time, and a wee bit of sacrifice (on both my end and my husband’s end).  Somehow I hit the jackpot when it comes to the father of my children and the one I share this life with.

While the Instagram stories and Facebook albums show the highlights and the photo ops and the funny moments, they don’t show the deep conversation, the connection, and the feeling of purpose behind the planning and preparation.  The feeling deep in my core that I am where I am supposed to be…with these women a few states away from home.

If you’re feeling lonely or discouraged or sad or angry at what life is throwing at you, I encourage you to get away with some friends.  Maybe you go to a movie or just get coffee or…you go as far as to book a VRBO for the weekend to drink wine under cozy blankets alternating between football and Poldark on the screen.  Maybe you take a crazy road trip in a mini van and eat big cheeseburgers and Subway and drink QT iced tea and Starbucks lattes.

Whatever you do, do it with the ones who make you laugh until you cry and (almost) pee your pants.  #momlife Do it with the ones who make you think and rethink and rethink again your thoughts on hair products and online dating and the good and the hard of this life.  Do it with the ones who make you better, who challenge you, who cheer you on, who are in your corner.  Do it with the ones you love and love you back.

Get away with girlfriends.  It will be an investment worth saying ‘yes’ to.