Resolutions. Goals. Mantras. Plans. Word of the year.
There are about a million ways to celebrate the New Year and many of them include some kind of goal making. Many Americans like to make fitness or work goals. Others will land on a reading or travel goal. Still others will make it a goal to learn a new skill or save money. Whatever the goal, research shows only 8% of Americans actually achieve their New Year’s resolution or goal. That’s a pretty low number considering all the New Year’s hype.
I don’t have the answer to why New Year’s resolutions don’t stick, but I can guess if other Americans are anything like me, it’s because we get overwhelmed with the prospect of striving to meet a goal for 12 months or 365 days (wow) and then we give up or forget or put it on the back burner. I can justify some reason to abandon my goal or I can get bored or lazy. It’s not too hard to give up some arbitrary goal that seems out of reach.
Last year around this time my husband and I started making Quarterly Goals. Every three months or so we sit down, think through, and write out our Quarterly Goals. We do this together and while it would be nice to have a long, luxurious date to discuss and ponder them, most of the time it’s done over a quick glass of wine after the kids go down for the night.
Our Quarterly Goal process is pretty straight forward, simple, and has made me more excited about goal setting and motivated me to actually meet my goals. Here is our fuss-free process.
Sit down and talk
If you have a spouse, set aside 30 minutes to an hour to discuss your Quarterly Goals for the next three months. You can also do this with a friend, another family member, or an older child. We do this in January, April, July, and October. You can do it at other times if that doesn’t work for you, but basically we do it every three months, give or take.
If one year goals get you more excited, awesome, go ahead and set that one year goal. Then think, “If I’m going to accomplish ‘X’ over the course of this year, what do I need to accomplish over the next 3 months?”
When we sit down to talk about it, we come having thought a bit beforehand. We each make two to three goals and then set one goal for each of our kids.
Make the goal specific and actionable
When making goals we form each goal to be actionable. For example, one of my goals this summer was to plan school for the fall. Basically I needed to get our school plan completed before the end of July. One of Kevin’s goals the past few months has been to run 150 miles by the end of the year. He just completed his goal (and is glad it’s over). Make sure you can see the goal in action and it’s specific enough you can see it happening.
Most of us find it easier to conceptualize what we want to accomplish rather than focusing on how we are going to do it. We want smart kids, more financial flexibility, and less flab; but how are we going to accomplish those things.
Some examples:
Instead of Get healthy use Go to the gym 2 days a week for the next 12 weeks.
Instead of Save money use Put aside 5% of each paycheck into savings.
Instead of Learn more use Read three times a week instead of watching TV at night.
Why Quarterly Goals? There are two really good reasons:
- Having a light at the end of the tunnel keeps us motivated to stay on the path.
- Ninety days is long enough to form habit.
Understanding how habits are major influences on our life is a key breakthrough in being able to lead a life of intention. I’m not just talking about bad habits like drinking and smoking (while those DEFINITELY count); I’m talking about other not-so-great habits like looking at social media first thing in the morning, buying sweets that weren’t on the grocery list, or (do I dare?) spreading gossip. But this is just a list of what some might say are bad habits. Other habits can be: giving praise to my daughter each time she asks for something politely, doing yoga 5 minutes EVERY morning right after waking, or reading a devotional each night.
Make the goal measurable
At the end of the three months you should be able to tell, without a doubt, if you met your goal or not. For example, instead of the goal: Eat Better. Try the goal: Eat at home 6 nights a week. It’s a specific, actionable goal and while trying to meet the goal, you have a clear standard on what it looks like and if you meet it or not. Make the goal measurable.
Ask yourself, “How will I know whether I accomplished this or not?”
Keep one thing in mind, the goal that is measurable might be less inspirational than the intention that came behind it. “Lose 30 pounds” is way more exciting than “abstain from sweets for 90 days”. So, as you identify and progress through your quarterly goal, remind yourself WHY you are doing it; this will help keep you on the path.
Kevin set the goal of running 150 miles in 4 months because he was coming off a period of injury-induced inactivity and was determined to get back on the path of staying physically active. Because he can only run a few miles at a time, he knew this would require him to run routinely. He knew he would have to run 8.5 miles per week and downloaded an app to make sure he kept himself ahead of the curve. The “why” behind all of this is that he lost quite a bit of weight over the last 5 years and he is determined to keep it off for the long haul.
Write it down
You have heard this before, but it’s true. Write your goals down. Research done by Dr. Gail Matthews, a psychology professor at the Dominican University in California, found people who write down goals are 42% more likely to achieve them.
Keep it simple and use your ‘Notes’ app on your phone or go all out with a whiteboard or bullet journaling. My husband and I use the ‘Notes’ app and I think we will continue logging that way. I have kept all past goals in there, so it’s interesting to see what we have done and how we can move forward with new goal setting.
Partner with someone. While peer pressure can be harmful for adolescents, it can be hugely beneficial for responsible adults.
Limit Yourself to 1-4 goals. If you set 8 goals, you are more likely to form the habit of not completing your goals. If you are just getting started on this, for the first quarter set three goals you absolutely know you can accomplish; then start ratcheting them up each quarter. Earn the mentality of thinking, “I know I can do this!” Accomplishing goals is a huge booster in confidence and self-esteem, which in turn helps us to accomplish more things in life.
Reflect
The reason I like Quarterly Goals is because there is a built in time to check in. At the end of each quarter, meet and discuss the goals from the last three months and set goals for the next three months. There have been times I continue with a goal for another three months, but that only happened once this past year. Reflection on how it went will keep you accountable and help you decide what should come next.
My Quarterly Goals
Because telling the internet your goals really helps with accountability, I’m going to share mine for the next three months with you.
- Find and read one book on parenting.
- Select homeschool curriculum for next year.
- Write 4 days a week.
These goals are specific, actionable and measurable. I will take these goals and make sure they play out in my daily life. Finding a book will be added to my to-do list weekly and then reading it will be added later. Writing will be on my to-do list four days each week and researching and selecting a curriculum will be something I will add on my daily to-do list each week until the curriculum is decided on and purchased.
Potential Categories of Goals:
Diet
Exercise
Faith and devotion
Parenting and Marriage
Career
Hobby or Travel
Financial
Household
Friends and Mentors
It may not be wise to set goals for each category each quarter, but it helps to consider them in deciding which goals to make a priority.
That’s it for Quarterly Goal Setting. Tell me, are you a Resolution Setter? How do you set goals for the coming year?