A Simpler Motherhood

Author: Vanessa

Vanessa

A Simpler Homeschool Daily Rhythm

A Simpler Homeschool

You are registered to homeschool. You have decided on curriculum. Your year is mapped out and you feel good about your plan for the next 9 months or first quarter. Now it’s time to think through what the day to day will look like. A Simpler Homeschool Daily Rhythm will allow you the peace of mind to go through your day to day with intentionality and purpose.

A Simpler Homeschool Daily Rhythm isn’t just for homeschooling moms, it’s for all moms who find themselves in need of direction with their days.

Unlike a big picture plan, which lays out the high level themes for each month, this thought out daily rhythm will get you from breakfast to math to quiet time in an intentional way. Every day is different, but having a rhythm in place gives us and our kids something to rely on and expect when it comes to school at home. Kids thrive in predictability and repetition, so let’s use that to our advantage to make our days run smoother.

Routine vs Rhythm

Rhythm just sounds better than routine, doesn’t it? The difference between a rhythm and a routine is flexibility and fluidity. A rhythm allows for movement, while a routine can seem rigid or inflexible. The way I like to think about these two terms is a routine works from a timetable, while a rhythm works from a sequence.

A homeschool routine could look something like this:

8:00 Language Arts

8:30 Math

9:00 Read Alouds

A homeschool rhythm simply takes out the timetable:

Language Arts

Math

Read Alouds

A rhythm allows us to move through our days without rushing and without a sense of unnerving urgency. It still gives us and our kids predictability and repetition all the while allowing the day to unfold around us as we learn beside our kids. I am type A by nature and although I sometimes struggle with the flexibility of a rhythm, I have found it to be more beneficial for my kids.

*Note: There are some families who need a timetable because of work schedules, baby schedules, personalities, or lots of other life things. If this is you, simply add it on Step 4.

Step 1: Think through A Simpler Homeschool Daily Rhythm

Grab a notebook and your Plan for A Simpler Homeschool Year. Close your eyes and think through what you want your days to look like. Picture yourself and your kids moving throughout the day learning together. Think through these questions:

1)When are my kids at their best?

When are your kids motivated, ready to learn, happy and well rested? When will they learn best? These questions will help you navigate when to have your school block.

2)What do my kids like to do in the morning, afternoon, evening?

Things go a lot smoother for us and our kids when we go with what is already working. If your kids like to have a long breakfast and play for a bit, build that into the daily rhythm and begin the school block after they have ample time to do what they love.

3)When am I at the top of my game?

It’s also important to think about when we are well rested and ready to teach. When are you ready to tackle the day and engage with your kids?

Step 2: Choose your school block

Now that you have thought through some variables that go into planning A Simpler Homeschool Daily Rhythm, choose a two to three hour school block. Homeschool looks different than public school when it comes to how much time is spent on instruction and school work. It’s concentrated work time and most schooling at home can be done in three hours or less. This two to three hour school block can be in one big chunk or sprinkled throughout the day. Although we are looking for a rhythm instead of a routine, I think it’s smart to have a (flexible) start and end time for the school block. Determine the school block time now.

Step 3: Make a List

And all the list makers said Amen. It’s time to make a list of all the subjects and activities you want to fit in a day. Get specific: Language Arts, Read Alouds, Science, Poetry, Scripture memorization. Whatever it is, get specific on the items you want to cover each day. Include lunch, snacks, playtime/recess, quiet time, and all the other extras. If you have multiple kids, be specific with what you want to do with each child.

Step 4: Think Order

Order is important. Transitions are important. They can either make the day run smoothly or make it seem like a train wreck. (For the record, I have had lots of both kinds of days.) Looking at the list of subjects and activities you want to cover in a day, think through what would be the best order to move through those activities. Remember back to the questions I asked at the beginning. When are your kids their best? Try to cover the core subjects then. Language Arts, Math, Science, History.

List the order of activities. I do this on the same Excel spreadsheet I use for planning the year. You can use Excel or simply list it in a planner or notebook. Intentionally think about what you want the day to look like, when is ideal for you and your kids to be at your best, and make a plan.

*Note: If you need a timetable, add it in now.

Believe it or not, it can take 23 minutes to get back on track following a significant interruption. That’s why it’s important to have as many smooth transitions from subjects and activities as possible so time isn’t wasted throughout the day.

Our Detailed Homeschool Daily Rhythm

a simpler homeschool daily rhythm

Be okay with edits.

It’s one thing to sit down and think through a daily rhythm, it’s another to implement it. Give yourself grace and understand there could be big or small edits to the daily rhythm you’ve created as you begin the school year. Although your daily rhythm might get altered, it’s still a good idea to create one at the beginning so you have a framework to work from. You can adjust as needed as you and your kids learn what works best for your family.

A Simpler Homeschool Daily Rhythm is attainable and will help you and your family navigate the day to day with intention and purpose. It is one small way you can make your homeschool year a bit simpler. Tell me: What will your daily homeschool rhythm look like this year?

Vanessa

Plan A Simpler Homeschool Year

A Simpler Homeschool

You’ve decided to homeschool.  You’ve decided to be both their parent and their teacher (although I would argue you’ve been that all along).  School at home can be overwhelming because it seems there are both no handbooks and a million handbooks.  Here you will find action steps that will take you from overwhelmed to prepared.  Start with The First 3 Steps to A Simpler Homeschool or Choosing Curriculum. Today let’s move on to how to Plan A Simpler Homeschool Year.

You have an entire school year ahead for you and your kiddos.  A big picture plan for the year can assist you in meeting your goals for the year as well as teaching what you want to teach.  I sit down every summer and plan the upcoming school year.  It’s something I enjoy and look forward to because there is a big part of me that loves a good plan.  This planning process takes a few hours, which I sprinkle over the course of a week or so.  I suggest working on one step as long as it takes then moving on to the next step.  No skipping steps! Here is the process to Plan A Simpler Homeschool Year.

***A NOTE. If planning an entire year seems overwhelming, simply plan one quarter of a year or eight to ten weeks. Go through this process with a mindset of Quarterly Planning.

plan a simpler homeschool year

Plan A Simpler Homeschool Year

1) Decide what weeks you will teach.

Open up an Excel document and grab a calendar. If a spreadsheet isn’t your thing, use a notebook. Go through the year and decide what weeks you will teach and what weeks will be breaks or holidays. Each state is different in their requirements for how many days or hours of school a homeschooling family must complete, so be sure to check HSLDA for your state’s specific laws or this post for more information.

What I Do

Excel is the tool I use for big picture homeschool planning.  I use the same Excel document every year, adding a new tab for a new year.  Using my Google calendar and Excel spreadsheet, I go through the year and decide what weeks we will formally do school.  In Iowa we are required to teach for 148 days, so I need to be sure to plan 30 weeks. This year I planned 33 weeks.  

2) Decide what to teach.

If you’re using a set curriculum, this will be done for you.  You simply will teach what they tell you to when they tell you to teach it.  If this is the case, there isn’t much you need to add to your notebook or Excel spreadsheet. If you’re not using a set curriculum, now is the time to lay out what month you will teach what.

Those of you rockstars creating your own curriculum, check out Common Core Standards, which links to your state and lists the standards by grade level.  You can also check out SchoolhouseTeachers, which lays out an easy to read scope and sequence for each grade level. Now is the time to write your curriculum for the year!

When it comes to lesson planning for multiple aged kids, many homeschooling families teach subjects together.  This cuts back on the separate lessons and also adds a sense of community in the home.  Art, History, Science, Music, Foreign Language, Read Alouds, and some Language Arts are subjects that can be taught across multiple ages with the same lessons.

What I Do

Our language arts and math curriculums provide schedules on when to teach each topic.  We rotate back and forth between History & Social Studies and Science. One month I will focus on History & Social Studies, the next a Science unit.  I note on the Excel spreadsheet when we will cover each subject and for Science, what our unit will be.  For example, this upcoming year we will cover Safety in August, History in September and Mammals in October. We gather as a family for a few subjects: Art, History, Science, and our read alouds.  

3) Plan the read alouds.

If your curriculum doesn’t include read alouds (Sonlight curriculum does), then make a list of books you would like to read throughout the year.  This list can include books that go with a History or Science unit, an author study, or a series of books like Narnia or The Boxcar Children or The Magic Treehouse.  If you have multiple kids, try and choose books that will appeal to everyone so you’re able to do them as a family.  A great resource for choosing excellent read alouds is Sarah Mackenzie’s Read Aloud Revivial.  She has great book lists for different subjects and ages.  Reading aloud is the single most important thing you can do in your homeschool, so planning out some quality literature to share with your kids is a worthwhile task.

What I Do

We do author studies or themes with picture books each month. For example, in July and August we will read books by Eric Carle. In October, we will read nonfiction books. I plan these author studies and themes with the help of Pinterest and authors I love or have heard about from the Read Aloud Revival.

I also make a list of chapter books to read aloud for the year. These books come from the Read Aloud Revival, Ambleside Online, and Sonlight’s listed read alouds. Sometimes we make it through most of them, sometimes we make it through half.  Creating a list guarantees there is always another read aloud on deck.

4) Plan the extras.

What else do you want to do this year? Devotions?  Poetry?  Calendar?  Music?  Art?  Cooking?  Scripture memorization?  There are loads of other things to teach our kids that aren’t included in the core subjects.  If you’re feeling these are important, schedule them into your year.  If this overwhelms you, simply skip this and add in these subjects as you have time and energy.  

What I Do

Our extras are simple and don’t take a lot of time and planning.  We read a Jesus Calling for Kids devotional everyday.  I have chosen four longer scriptures to memorize this year, five songs to sing and memorize, and four poems to memorize.  Our language arts curriculum includes art appreciation, but we also create 1-2 art projects a week tied to the seasons, holidays, or read alouds.  I plan these as we go, not on the front end.

Planning the year is absolutely attainable if taken in small chunks and completed step by step. Remember to work through and complete each step before moving to the next. At the end you will have a Plan for A Simpler Homeschool Year.

Vanessa

Curriculum for A Simpler Homeschool

A Simpler Homeschool

When deciding to homeschool, choosing curriculum seems to be at the top of the to-dos. Although you can absolutely write your own curriculum, this post is for those of us who want some help. We want to know what to teach and how to teach it. Choosing curriculum doesn’t have to be complicated. While time and energy will definitely be spent deciding on curriculum, utilizing a step by step process will enable you to make decisions efficiently and get you closer to A Simpler Homeschool.

When we first began our homeschooling journey, I labored over curriculum choices and wanted the best of the best. While the curriculum we used the first few years was good, it was overwhelming for my type A personality because it was so much and I wanted to check it all off. This past year, I switched curriculums and we all are much happier.

It is easy to choose a great curriculum, but it takes a whole lot of intentionality to choose one that fits your personality, your kids, your lifestyle.

My hope is that by taking these steps you will be able to choose the best curriculum for your family and be closer to A Simpler Homeschool.

choosing curriculum

Steps to Choosing Curriculum

1)Set your budget.

Money matters. What do you have to spend on curriculum? $50? $200? $600? $1000? Curriculums come at all price points, so nail down how much you’re able to spend.

Good Options for All Price Points

$0-$100

Language Arts

The Good and the Beautiful

We use The Good and the Beautiful for Language Arts and Science. The Language Arts curriculum for grades 1-5 is available to download for free. If you want the printed version, it’s a little under $60. Their History, Science, Math, and Handwriting curriculum has the affordable option of downloaded versions from $9-$30. You can also purchase the hard copies. We have enjoyed the quality and simplicity of this curriculum.

Note: This curriculum is created by a woman who is Mormon. While many different denominations of Christians were brought in to create The Good and the Beautiful, I think it’s important to note this. We haven’t found any issues when it comes to beliefs from this curriculum, as we are from a Christian perspective and not LDS/Mormon. There is some controversy on this and wanted to be sure to note it.

Handwriting without Tears

I used Handwriting without Tears when I taught first grade and have always thought it was thorough and easy to understand for young writers. A workbook costs anywhere from $8-$14 and the teacher’s manual, which is not completely necessary, runs about $18. There are extra manipulatives and tools you can buy, but we have never purchased these and it still works great.

Teach Your Child to Read in 100 Easy Lessons

We use this book to teach phonics and reading. Luke learned to read pretty quickly with this book at around age 5 and Lily is currently working through it. It costs about $17. It takes some reading beforehand to understand the format. Once you understand the process and how it’s laid out, each lesson is completely scripted and easy to follow.

My Story and the World Around Me

This is a social studies curriculum that introduces students to history, politics, geography, economics from a Christian perspective. The level one book is set up into four quests, which any adventure loving kid will love. One book is around $30.

A Child’s First Book of American History

If you’re looking to teach history through stories, this book will provide a look at American History through 50 illustrated stories. This book is a little under $40 and would be a good introduction to history for young learners.

Explode the Code

This phonics based program is research based and systematic. While I have never used Explode the Code, I have heard great things about it. A workbook runs around $10. There is also the option for an online subscription that costs $65 for a 12 month subscription.

Math

Jump Math

Jump Math is a workbook that relies on the common core math standards. I personally have not used these books. If you are a parent that is going to homeschool for a short while, this could be a good option for you. Each workbook costs about $16.

Life of Fred Math

Life of Fred Math is a series that uses humorous stories to teach math. This isn’t a typical workbook with problems to solve, it’s more like puzzles to solve. We have never used this series, but have been contemplating them, as I have a reluctant math learner. The series seems to be fun and keeps the attention of the learner. A set runs about $60.

Singapore Math

If you are a parent planning on sending your kids back to public school after this year, Singapore Math could be a good option for you. The Common Core seems to use similar strategies as the Singapore Math model. Student workbooks run a little over $14 and the home instructor’s guide runs $19.

All in One

AmblesideOnline

Ambleside Online is a Charlotte Mason based free Christian curriculum. While this is more of a way to teach, it offers great resources and a weekly schedule of what books to read and what to teach. It is literature heavy with classic and engaging books to be read at each age level.

$100-$500

Math-U-See

Math-U-See uses a video format to teach each lesson and then workbook pages to complete subsequent days. This is the math curriculum we use. The first time you buy, it runs about $140 because the integer block kit is included. If you already have the integer block kit, it costs around $70 for the new DVD, workbook, and teachers manual.

My Father’s World

With a strong Christian perspective, My Father’s World is set up to be a complete curriculum from History to Language Arts. The curriculum is rich with literature and uses Charlotte Mason and classical education philosophies. The full History package runs $280-$410. Language Arts and Math separately are more reasonable.

Time4Learning

If you are looking for an online learning program, Time4Learning is an option. It’s $19.95/month per student, which is about $180 a year per student. It covers language arts, math, science, and social studies. A perk of this curriculum is students can work at different grade levels for different subjects since it is customizable.

$500+

Sonlight

If you are looking for a curriculum taught from a Biblical perspective that covers everything, even the books, Sonlight is it. You can choose from a four or five week schedule and it includes Math-U-See for Math and Handwriting without Tears for handwriting. It runs about $670-$760 for the entire program, but you are able to purchase specific subjects for much less.

Bookshark

Bookshark is similar to Sonlight in that it is literature based, but without the Christian perspective. It’s around $760 for all the curriculum for the year. They use levels instead of grades and utilize a four day school week.

Abeka

Although I have never used Abeka, I have heard from many homeschoolers who like it. Abeka is taught from a Biblical perspective. An entire Child Kit, including all subjects, runs about $350 and the parent kit runs from $260 for the Essential Parent Kit to $570 for the Complete Parent Kit. The total comes to $610 to $920 including everything you need for the year.

They also have an option for Abeka Academy, which utilizes video ‘teachers’ to teach your kids at home. Tuition and books run $959 for the entire year or $695 for one semester for elementary.

These are not all the choices out there, simply a place to begin.

2)Decide if you want to choose one curriculum for all subjects or many.

It is far easier to choose one curriculum that covers all the core subjects. Decide if you want to go this route or look at individual curriculum for each individual subject. Sonlight, Bookshark, Time4Learning, The Good and the Beautiful, and Abeka are all curriculums that include all subjects.

3)Choose 2-3 options for each subject or 2-3 options for an all in one curriculum.

There is a simpler way! By choosing just 2-3 options, you can focus on those options, what they offer, and make an informed choice. You can research and get a good handle on how to use the curriculum.

Our Current Curriculum Choices

Language Arts: The Good and the Beautiful

Reading: Teach Your Child to Read in 100 Easy Lessons

Handwriting: Handwriting without Tears

Math: Math-U-See

History/Social Studies: My Story and the World Around Me and A Child’s First Book of American History

Science: The Good and the Beautiful

Curriculum Options I have considered:

Sonlight

My Father’s World

Abeka

Life of Fred

Singapore Math

Explode the Code

4)Research the options!

This is the real legwork of the process. If you do the legwork now, you are taking one giant step towards A Simpler Homeschool. Seek out reviews on YouTube and blogs to get a handle on how the curriculum is laid out and works. A question to ask yourself as you are researching:

Will this curriculum work for me and my family? Not the other way around. I have learned the hard way that curriculum is a tool. I don’t want to be a slave to it. Be sure to look at sample pages as you ask this question and determine if the format works for you and your family.

Curriculum Reviewers

These are reviewers I have used in the past. They have their hands on lots of curriculum.

Cathy Duffy Reviews

Homeschool On

5)Decide.

After researching, decide which curriculum will work best for your family and feel good about it. Use what you’ve learned and make the most informed decision possible. There will always be ‘what ifs’, but you can feel good about the decision because of the research you did on the front end.

Choosing curriculum is a necessary step towards A Simpler Homeschool. With a little intentionality and small steps, it can be a decision you feel good about.

Tell me, what curriculum will you be researching or using this school year?

Vanessa

The First 3 Steps to A Simpler Homeschool

A Simpler Homeschool

School at home has become a hot topic of conversation the past several months. With school shutdowns this past spring, families were forced to figure out how to teach kids at home. Fall is approaching fast and families are waiting to hear what the new normal school routine will look like. It could mean a lot of different things for public and private school learning. It could also mean deciding to keep kids home for a year.

the first 3 steps

The First 3 Steps

Whatever becomes your new norm, I want to share the first three steps for those of you considering school at home. They will help you make a decision for your family and lay out the initial steps to school at home this coming year. Our family has walked through this process the past few years and I hope it will helpful for those of you considering school at home.

Step 1: Decide

Deciding whether to homeschool or not can be overwhelming and seem like a mountain of a decision. Although it is a big decision, it is one you can make confidently by intentionally asking some good questions.

Why do I want to homeschool?

Maybe it’s related to the current culture, COVID, or some other time sensitive reason. Maybe you have decided you want to give it a try to be more involved with what your kids are learning. Or maybe you want more time with your kids. Whatever the reason, get clear on it now. This reason will motivate you throughout the school year as well as help you navigate questions from friends and family.

Do I have support from family and friends?

Although homeschooling can be done without family support, it’s a lot easier and more successful with everyone on board. There will be times throughout the school year when things get hard and you want the support system in place. It’s also good to seek out others who are homeschooling to find community, especially if the family support isn’t in place.

Am I up for a challenge?

Homeschooling is one of the most rewarding and challenging things I have chosen to do in my life. Are you in a headspace mentally to be up for the challenge? Things don’t have to be perfect (and won’t be), but being motivated and committed to the task of homeschooling goes a long way come January.

A side note to this: If your kids have been in public school prior to homeschooling, there is a good chance you will get some push back. Although I have not been in this position, I have had my kids ask about going to school. Remember: You are the parent and like everything else in their life, you are the captain of the ship. It’s important to have a discussion with your kids and ask for input, but ultimately, you make the call. Give yourself and your kids grace as you make this decision.

Asking yourself these three questions can help you navigate your thoughts and feelings about the decision to homeschool and guide your next steps.

Step 2: State Requirements

You’ve answered some questions and decided to move forward. Now what? Depending on where you live, it’s time to file the paperwork for homeschooling in your state.

Each state is different when it comes to homeschooling. We live in Iowa, which has multiple different options for homeschooling. Our neighboring state, Nebraska, has one option. Both require different forms and notification to school districts. This Homeschool Laws by State website addresses each state and gives an overview on what the requirements are to homeschool and even links to forms needed. It might seem overwhelming at first, but it is possible and necessary if you want to take the steps for school at home.

After checking out the Homeschool Laws by State website to get an overview, be sure to check out your state’s Department of Ed website as well. You can find Iowa’s homeschool rules here: Homeschooling in Iowa and Nebraska’s homeschool rules here: Homeschooling in Nebraska. If you’re confused, email the contact listed on the state homeschooling site. The Iowa homeschool contact emailed me right back and answered my specific questions quickly.

Step 3: Curriculum

While registering with your specific state for homeschooling, it’s time to start thinking about curriculum. There is a difference between what to teach and how to teach it. What you teach are the skills, strategies, and standards appropriate for each age or grade level. How you teach are the lessons you use to teach those skills, strategies, and standards.

It’s time to decide if you want to purchase a curriculum or create your own. Purchasing a curriculum gives you both what to teach and how to teach it. It will allow you to use your time and energy to teach your kids and not think through how to do it. By using a purchased curriculum, there is not much guesswork, as the company has done the research for you and planned the lessons.

Creating your own curriculum gives you complete control over what your kids will learn and how they will learn it. Although it will take a lot of work on your part, you are able to create the exact learning experience you want for your kids. If this is the route you want to take, you can find a Scope and Sequence for all grade levels at Schoolhouse Teachers. If you are a family planning to homeschool for only a year and your state has adopted the Common Core standards (Iowa has, Nebraska hasn’t), the Common Core standards are a good place to start.

There is no ‘right’ way.

There is not a ‘right’ way to homeschool or choose curriculum. Each family is different and possesses varying resources including time, energy, and financial means. Don’t let guilt play into this decision. Make a decision based on what you believe is best for your family.

As I said in this post, I taught first grade in public school five years pre-kids, have been homeschooling for the past few years, and have my Masters in Curriculum and Instruction. I have never created my own curriculum for homeschool. My main reason for not creating curriculum has been time and energy. I want to spend my time and energy teaching my kids and not spending time creating the next lesson plan. I still get my feet wet with fun projects or holiday lessons because that lights me up, but I leave the core lesson planning to my curriculum.

If you have decided to purchase a curriculum it’s time to move onto choosing it. In the next post I will be addressing the process we have used in the past to choose the best curriculum for our family.

The first 3 steps are big ones, but each step forward paves the way to a positive and simpler homeschool year.

Vanessa

What is A Simpler Motherhood?

A Simpler Homeschool, A Simpler Motherhood

Big blue eyes staring at me with a mouthful of bananas and oatmeal.  Words being sounded out by my daughter, slow, steady, and confident.  My son’s face dripping wet with strawberry juice after a snack in the garden.  Vroom-vroom being called out by my three year old as he lines up matchbox cars.  These are the pictures I see everyday.  Visions of small pieces of life being played out hour by hour, minute by minute, right before my eyes.  They may not be extraordinary to anyone else, but they are to me when I am present in the moment and see the little faces before me.

a simpler motherhood

What is A Simpler Motherhood?

A Simpler Motherhood is making space for what matters most.  The sticky faces, the big blue eyes, the family walks.  It’s a journey towards presence and an understanding that our things don’t make a good life; our people do.  A Simpler Motherhood is not a ten step process, but taking small steps to make the everyday simpler and more joyful.  It’s getting rid of the excess and clutter so we can see and live the life we want.  It’s living with a posture of gratitude for the gifts God has given us and being generous with those gifts.  A Simpler Motherhood includes doing things we are passionate about and filling our cup so we can give to others out of it’s abundance.  It’s loving and accepting others for their choices and who they are.  A Simpler Motherhood begins with grace: grace for ourselves, grace for our kids, and grace for those around us. 

When I first started this little place on the internet, I had one desire: to offer moms ways they can get to less stuff and more life.  It’s evolved over the past few years as our world has evolved and my journey has evolved, but my passion is the same: To give moms hope, encouragement and practical tools needed to live the life they want.  

What’s next?

A lot has changed this past year in our world with the Covid pandemic.  One of those things changing is how families are thinking about their child’s education for this upcoming school year.  This change has caused some anxiety and left parents with lots of questions. I have homeschooled my kiddos for the past few years and taught first grade in public school for five years pre-kids.  I have my Masters in Education in Curriculum and Instruction.  My desire is to use the knowledge I have to bring encouragement and practical tools to moms in the area of homeschooling.  

Over the next several weeks and months, I will be sharing about our homeschooling experience, tools and processes we use, and basic information about school at home.  I will still be sharing ways I am journeying towards A Simpler Motherhood in ways of simplifying. A big focus will be to offer whatever support I can to moms choosing school at home or doing virtual school through their school district.  

These last five months have divided people more than I like to think about, but I believe there are spaces where we can come together, support one another, and live more life.  My prayer for this space is just that.  No judgement, no shaming, no rolling of the eyes.  Just a space to gather to be vulnerable, learn a little, support each other, and offer ourselves, our kids, and each other loads of grace.  Will you join me?

Vanessa

Dads Matter

A Simpler Childhood, A Simpler Motherhood

‘Come on, Daddy’, Luke shouts as his wet feet climb the steps to the top deck at our local swimming quarry. Kevin is right behind him, ready and willing to jump with his son. Sunscreen on his body and a smile on his face, he hides the fact he is semi-exhausted from all the jumping and swimming and rope swinging. They jump in wide eyed and care free, their bodies hitting the water with a Daddy sized splash and a Luke sized splash. They swim to the ladder and do it all over again and again and again.

dads matter

Dads Matter. With God’s good grace, my kids are blessed with a Dad who couldn’t love them more and shows them daily with his actions, his presence, and his willingness to jump off the high deck. Dads are bed time story readers, high deck jumpers, princes for their princesses, providers, yard work masters. They are the ones our kids look to for protection, for wisdom, for attention, for love. They are indispensable. So much so, that research has been coming out in bucketfuls lately to support the importance of a father figure in a child’s life.

Dads Matter

The ‘Father Effect’ refers to paternal presence. The effects of a Dad’s presence or father figure in a child’s life is much. Dads showing up and being engaged in their child’s life has numerous positive effects. An engaged father can result in: higher level success in a career, a better chance at having a strong marriage, and an improved ability at handling stress. Children who are close with their father are twice as likely as those who are not to enter college or find stable employment after high school. They are also 75% less likely to have a teen birth and 80% less likely to spend time in jail, and half as likely to experience multiple depression symptoms. Dads clearly matter.

Father’s Day is Sunday!

Father’s Day is this Sunday, June 21. It doesn’t get as much hoopla as the big Moms’ Day in May, but it’s just as important. Not only am I blessed with a husband who is an incredible Daddy, I also grew up with an All In Dad who was by my side through all the sports things and dance things and pageant things. He has loved me well. And the past decade and a half I have known my father-in-law, who loves and plays hard with my kids. I have been blessed with strong, loving fathers in my life.

Let’s celebrate the men showing up day after day for us and our kids. I know sometimes it’s easy to get caught up in what they aren’t doing, but this weekend let’s focus on what they are doing. Let’s point out the things they do that go unnoticed: taking out the garbage, jumping off the high deck at the swimming hole, reading all the Star Wars names right at bedtime. Let’s notice the things they do everyday to make things run smoothly: going to work to provide for the family or staying home to take care of the family, mowing the lawn, teaching the boys the correct way to use the bathroom outside or dancing with the girls to just one more song. Let’s celebrate the little things and the big things and be grateful for their role in our families. Let’s show up for them and make them feel valued, respected, and loved.

One thing we do each year for our main man is use words to express our love and appreciation. I interview each kid and ask them a few questions about Daddy, which always results in some laughable answers. A question asked every year is: Why do you love Daddy? This question is my favorite because it reminds me how much my kids deeply love their Daddy. We write all this in his Memory Book and share with him on Father’s Day. It’s a simple tradition, but one, I believe, that will never grow old.

How will you celebrate the Dads in your life this year?

Vanessa

5 Plants You Can’t Kill

A Simpler Home

About fifteen years ago, I received an orchid from my then boyfriend for my birthday. It was an odd gift for a twenty year old who was living on Taco Bell, 80s music, and post-basketball game gatherings. The orchid was beautiful, purple and bright, a tall slender stem with a few robust leaves. It was full of life. Slowly and surely, I drained the life out of it. It didn’t take long to kill that beautiful plant.

plants you can't kill

And although I either watered it too much or too little, it became infamous, my basketball team coining a pre-game shoot out after it. Not all was lost after the death of the orchid, I married the man who gave it to me a few short years later.

The orchid began a slow and steady journey towards green thumbing. Outside plants, inside plants, succulents, more orchids, ferns, herbs, roses. I won’t sugar coat it and say my thumb is green. However, I have learned a lot these past fifteen years thanks to my husband and my mother in law (a literal Master Gardener).

Today I want to share with you some plants you can’t kill. There is a caveat to this because of course you can kill any plant if you put your mind to it, but if you try, just a little, these plants will have mercy on you and live.

Phlox

If you are looking for a plant to spread everywhere, grow tall, and give your yard an English garden look, phlox is for you. It is a perennial, which means it will come back year after year. There are loads of colors to choose from and it flowers here in the midwest from July until September. Phlox likes good soil and lots of sun.

I have only planted phlox in the ground, so I am unsure how it will do in a container, but it could be worth a try. We love phlox because it grows tall and fills the back of our garden beds, keeps out weeds, and provides pretty color in the late summer. We have mainly purples, pinks, and whites. Creeping phlox is also pretty if you’re looking for ground cover.

My biggest con for this one is it spreads so easily. I end up digging lots of phlox up throughout the summer because it ends up where it’s not supposed to be.

Sedum

If you google sedum, you will quickly learn that up to 600 species exist. On our farm we have a few varieties and I haven’t killed any of them, yet. Sedum likes full sun, although it can tolerate partial sun, because it has loads of grace. Sedum has thick, waxy leaves and is my go-to plant to keep the weeds out.

The varieties we have on the farm fall into two separate categories: ‘upright sedum’ and ‘low-growing sedum’. The upright sedum is a nice circular clump. It is a perennial, and although it does spread, it looks great year after year. It stays green through the summer and then turns a muted pink in the fall. It isn’t a typical cut flower, but I love to bring some inside in September and early October.

The low growing sedum lives in about every garden on the farm. I can literally throw it in a garden bed and it will grow. It looks great in pots and is pretty ground cover to keep out the weeds.

Mint

Mojitos anyone? If you want to dip your toe into growing your own herbs, start with mint. Before kids, my husband and I would grow mint by the bucketfuls, not on purpose, of course. One plant in our garden bed turned into enough mint for the neighborhood. Two things to learn here: it’s hard to kill mint and it grows like a weed.

I suggest growing mint in a pot, to hinder it from taking over your garden. Mint smells delicious and is the perfect ingredient to make your summertime mojito dreams come true.

Jade

If you’re looking for an easy to grow indoor plant for your kitchen or living room, jade is it. Jade plants like full sun and to be watered when the top of the soil is dry to the touch. I’m sure they do better if you water them when they need it, but I’m not always on top of it. Jade plants have been the only plants to survive during the first month after a new baby or week long vacations.

Cilantro

Another herb on my list is cilantro. It is easier to kill than the others, but it’s worth the extra effort because fresh cilantro on tacos is life. It can be planted in a pot or the garden and likes partial/full sun. What’s great about cilantro is it can reseed itself. It will form little seeds, called coriander, and when the seeds drop, new plants will grow. You can, of course, pinch the seeds off and grow in another spot yourself as well.

I have found it’s a good idea to plant coriander seeds/cilantro at two different times, so there is always fresh cilantro to pick. Plant some seeds in one spot and then a few weeks later, plant some seeds in another spot. Then your tacos can always have fresh, green cilantro on top.

The garden this time of year is a happy place. With a bit of effort, it can yield some pretty and possibly yummy green things.

What have you planted recently? Are there any plants you think are impossible to kill? Share in the comments.

Vanessa

One Thing for a Cleaner Home

A Simpler Home

Home is where the heart is and our hearts sure have been home a lot more lately. Being home together has created so many memories (good memories, hard memories, and memories that will define #quarantine2020) and has also given us ample opportunity to do all the things together. Lots of things are happening in our homes and those things create a lot of one thing: messes. Meal messes, craft messes, toy messes, potty training related toilet paper messes, laundry messes, grass and mud in the house messes, baking messes, outside messes, more meal messes. Messes can literally take over our home.

My personality lends itself to like tidiness. I like things picked up, organized, put away. As you can imagine, my family of one husband and four babes doesn’t lend itself to being naturally tidy. Messes, yes. Tidy, no.

The One Thing for a Cleaner Home

The last several months of quarantine I have been paying attention to why and how our home becomes messy to the point of frustration. I have noticed our home is cleaner and tidier when there is less stuff available. Our house is easier to get back to ‘ground zero’ if there is less to pick up, less to put away, and less to manage and organize.

one thing

The one thing for a cleaner home is less stuff.

Not a cleaning schedule. Not hiring a cleaner (although that helps). Not buying the most natural cleaning supplies. Not even making your kids do it (although that helps a bunch, too).

The fastest road to a cleaner home is the stuff in it.

It is far easier for my family to tidy up, clean up, and get things put away when there isn’t a lot to tidy up, clean up, put away. I’m not saying we all need to get rid of everything we own, I’m saying if we are a teeny bit intentional with the things out and available in our home, it could save us some cleaning and some sanity.

Take Action

If you are in, let’s start with the main living area. Think of the place where your family spends the most time. Grab a trash bag and clear at least one large surface in the space, then take about half of the nonessential stuff and put it in the bag. If you need more bags, grab them. Put those trash bags in a closet for a week, maybe two, and wait. This isn’t forever, it’s an experiment to see if for your family and your home, less stuff will equate to a cleaner home.

Pay attention the next few weeks to see if your experiment is working. Is it easier to clean the space? It is simpler to keep it tidy? If in a few weeks you miss the stuff and you don’t see a difference, pull it back out of the closet and add it back in. If there is a noticeable difference, consider parting with those items or moving them to another part of the house or rotating items out of a closet, similar to a toy closet.

We all want to love the space we live in everyday. One way to love it is to make it easier to clean and keep up. Tell me: will you try the one thing for a cleaner home?

Vanessa

Celebrating during Quarantine

A Simpler Motherhood

Birthdays, graduations, anniversaries, baby showers, baby arrivals, weddings. Life is full of celebrations this time of year and, unfortunately, they are looking a lot different in midst of Covid-19. My heart goes out to all the people having to reschedule big events like postponing graduation parties or weddings or limiting the people who get to visit a newborn.

We haven’t had any big life events, but Kevin and I are celebrating our 13th wedding anniversary next week. I am both excited to have something to look forward to and sad we won’t be visiting one of our favorite spots to celebrate. There, of course, are bigger problems in the world and I refuse to dwell on not having a night out for our anniversary. We are healthy, we are safe, and we are still going to celebrate.

While our celebration will look different than years past, there are still some things we will do to hold tight to tradition and make it special. We will write in each other’s Memory Books. We will pop a bottle of champagne to share. We will exchange small gifts to commemorate the day. We are going to try really hard to have dinner, just the two of us. It might look different, but I am determined it will still be fun and we will still be celebrating the love we pledged (in our backyard) to one another 13 years ago.

Celebrations might look different during this season, but we can still be thoughtful and honor the real reason behind the celebrating. Here are some fun ways to celebrate a special event while in Quarantine:

Make a special meal.

This year we are doing something different and getting a delivery meal service to make a meal just the two of us. We are using Hello Fresh. I have also heard great things about Sunbasket. One reason I like the idea of making a meal is we can do it together. It is half entertainment, half nourishment. Think about something you’ve never made or only make for special occasions: donuts, beef bourguignon, a homemade cake, steaks and asparagus on the grill with hollandaise sauce. Get all the ingredients and make it a fun part of the celebration.

Another way to celebrate is picking up take out from a local spot and setting up a candle lit dinner at the dining room table or getting cozy and casual on the couch with some yummy food you didn’t have to make.

If you want to celebrate with someone outside your immediate family, sending a meal service or getting them take out also serves the purpose of celebrating them, even if you can’t be in their physical presence.

Feasting is something I believe whole heartedly in and can be done right at home.

Shower love.

If someone you love is celebrating something special, why not invite friends and family to send cards or record a short video for them. Mail is a love language these days whether it comes in the mailbox or via text. If you’re creative, compile videos sent into a movie. I promise it will be something they always cherish.

Start a Celebration Journal.

Kevin and I have been using Celebration journals for around 7 years now. Everyone in our family has a Celebration Journal we write in on special occasions. All you need is a blank journal and you immediately save yourself money and time. No more scouring the stores or Amazon for the perfect card or forgetting the special day and being unprepared.

If you don’t feel like you’re qualified to write something in a Celebration Journal, google it and you can borrow from many who do this sort of thing for a living. A formula I have found helpful when writing in Kevin’s or the kids’ Celebration Journals: Quote/Scripture+Memory+Sentiment is always, always rewarded with a kiss or a hug. I also love Top 10 lists for birthdays, anniversaries, or New Year’s. A Celebration Journal is one way to both simplify and celebrate occasions in a special way.

Send a local gift.

Coffee, candles, a book from a local book store, fresh farm eggs, flowers, a charcuterie board. If you want to celebrate someone, branch out from the usual Amazon search and send them a bag of local coffee or flowers from the downtown flower shop. Some favorites: Archetype Coffee Subscription, Wax Buffalo Candles, Old Tree Farm, The Grey Plume, Zaltes Ice Cream. Support local while also celebrating loved ones.

Decorate anyways.

Get the fresh flowers. Put up the streamers. Pick up the balloons. Get dressed up. Make the celebration feel like a celebration with all the fun trimmings. My goal is to put on real clothes, make-up, and maybe even blow dry my hair for our 13th anniversary. The little things are the big things when it comes to celebrating in quarantine.

Celebrating at home is still celebrating. How have you celebrated during Quarantine?

Vanessa

Homeschooling Year #2

A Simpler Childhood, A Simpler Motherhood

Homeschooling Year #2 is officially in the books. Curriculum is put away, the year has been celebrated, and summer break is upon us. I am here for it. This year ended much differently than anticipated, but it was still sweet and we still had much to celebrate. We ended the school year with our annual last day of school picture, a tea party, and celebrating the successes of the past ten months. It was a good year indeed.

homeschooling year

Not surprisingly, I learn just as much as the kids do each year, although it’s always shocking how my thinking in September can change so much come May. I’m thankful there is so much grace and my kids are (mostly) oblivious to the tweaks I make throughout the year in how we do school, my attitude, and the way I interact with them. It’s such a gift to be able to grow and change right alongside my babes. It’s something I hope I never take for granted.

Last year, I shared the things I learned my first year of homeschooling. It’s a post I think I will continue each year, as it is both fun and purposeful to look back and reflect and use those thoughts to navigate the upcoming year. We can’t learn from the past if we don’t reflect and thoughtfully consider the past.

Here are my rambling thoughts from this past homeschool year:

Open and go Curriculum > Intense Curriculum

I’ve tried two language arts curriculums. My first year homeschooling the curriculum we used was very thorough, intense, and good. This year we went with a curriculum that was straightforward, open and go, and still good. Open and go is my go to. I like the simplicity of open and go curriculum and the freedom it allows not to be tethered to a weekly or monthly schedule. I want to dictate how the curriculum works for me, not the other way around.

Because of my teaching background, I pull in books, activities, and lessons alongside the set curriculum. My first year I was overwhelmed with the intensity of the curriculum because I was trying to do my own thing, too. This year, I chose The Good and the Beautiful and was extremely happy with it. I literally opened the book and Luke and I worked together through the lessons. The Good and the Beautiful language arts curriculum includes grammar and punctuation, phonics and reading, spelling, literature and art.

Lily will be starting kindergarten next year and Luke will be in second grade. We are going to stick with The Good and the Beautiful. The open and go style is what I need both for my personality and for this season of life.

The early bird gets the worm.

School goes much more smoothly if we knock it out right out of the gates. If Luke gets started with his independent work around 8:00, the day ticks by in an organized fashion. If he starts later than 9:00, it’s a different story. It’s not always perfect, but I have seen a noticeable difference in the flow of our day when we start early. Starting early will stick around as long as it works.

Flip a coin for the schoolroom.

Each morning Luke, Lily, Jude, and I meet in the school room for our devotion, calendar, and a joint lesson. Some days this is my favorite time of our school day, other days I want to go cry in the bathroom. This summer I want to think through the organization of this part of our day and see if there are any tweaks I can implement to make it smoother.

When there is something not going well in our school day, I use a lot of trial and error to attempt a solution. I will be brainstorming some different scenarios this summer.

Integration!

If we don’t get school started on time or something takes twice as long as planned (this happens often), there is a good chance science or social studies could be overlooked. Unless I am super intentional, we just don’t get it in.

In the fall and winter we did our science or social studies lesson in the early afternoon, right before naps. Because it was the last thing, it wasn’t accomplished as often as I would have liked. This spring I integrated our science into various lessons during our time together in the school room and it was completed almost always. Granted, we have had extra time on our hands the past few months, but I discovered I need to integrate science and social studies into a part of our day already happening.

Will work for Magic School Bus.

My kids will bust their britches to earn some screen time. Mrs. Frizzle and Dino Dana are quite enticing to my crew. I have used their motivation to my advantage this year.

The kids don’t get any screen time until right before quiet time, unless I’m showing a Youtube video for school or they are doing an Art Hub. Holding off on giving them screen time until the end of our school day is something I will continue next year because, well, it works.

This school year was both fun and frustrating. Luke discovered writing can be purposeful and fun and Lily found her spark for reading. This year was chock full of change as well as routines. It was one I will remember and hold tight to because all my babies were together and I was given the privilege to be their teacher. My kids sure learned a lot this year, but so did I.

Whether you homeschooled pre-covid or not, what is something you learned this school year?