Author: Vanessa

The Christmas season is in full swing with Thanksgiving behind us and, just like that, December is here.  It truly is a magical time of year.  A few years ago I was met with the dilemma of being very pregnant with two babes, little energy and the same four weeks in front of me.  I decided to simplify our Christmas season while holding tight to the joy and magic.  Friends, it was one of the best things I have done as a mom. I learned a lot that year about how I wanted Christmas to look and feel and have tweaked it each Christmas. Here are some ways I have found to A Simpler Christmas…

Simpler Fashion

Dressing myself and four children during the holidays is no joke.  When we are going to a fun Christmas event or party, I want us to look somewhat presentable, even if it’s inevitable I won’t get a picture of all of them looking at the camera.  This year I have two to three outfits picked out for each of us for this season.  Think Christmas Capsule.  Luke and Jude have a few shirts, a sweater and jeans and Lily a few dresses.  Jack has two festive outfits to wear to fun Christmas-y things. I have a few tops paired with jeans or leggings and one dress for more formal gatherings.  Kevin is on his own, because he always looks good and selecting male clothing is not my gift.  A Christmas capsule eliminates sifting through closets on Saturday mornings in December.

Simpler Gifting

If you’ve been following along on Instagram, you know I am done Christmas shopping! I set a goal in My Christmas Plan to be done shopping by December 1. I am a week late, but I made it!

This year I simplified gifting by shopping online as much as possible as well as think about gifting similar gifts to groups of people.  For example, I am giving one simple gift to all of Luke, Lily, and Jude’s church teachers and some groups of girlfriends. I want people to feel loved and appreciated this season, but I think it can be done in a way that doesn’t bring bunches of stress to the giver.

If you want more ideas, head to my post on 3 Ways to Simplify Christmas Gifting.

Simpler Decorating

We are a family who bundles up, trudges out to a tree farm, and chooses a Christmas tree to cut down.  It’s one of my favorite traditions we have as a family of six.  After cutting down the tree, we spend the rest of the day pulling out ornaments and lights and decorating the tree and the rest of the house.  It is a fun day and usually ends with something slow cooking in the oven, crusty bread, and hot chocolate. We did this thing last weekend and it was a little bit magical.

The easiest and most straight forward way I have found to simplify decorating is this: Use less stuff.

As our kids have gotten older, they have wanted to help with making our home look like a winter wonderland.  I try as hard as I can to give my Type-A personality the back seat and let the kids drive the decorating.  We get done what we can on decorating day and let the rest wait until another time or never.

The year our house was under renovation and I was pregnant, I cut back on decorating a ton.  And you know what, it was still magical and the kids still had a wonderful Christmas.  I have found twinkle lights do wonders and the kids each have their own special decorations that make it more magical for them.

Candles, fresh flowers and greens, and dishes filled with candy are simple things I do around Christmas to make our home a bit more festive.  And a bonus, I don’t have to store them away when the new year rolls around. Check out more about Simplifying Holiday Decorating in this post.

Simpler Advent Calendar

Lucky for me, I have a seven year old this year.  He doesn’t let me even think about forgetting the Advent calendar.  Mommas of super littles, someday you will have a little person to keep you on track (whether you want them to or not).

Our advent calendar this year looks similar to the past few years.  I decided on three random acts of kindness and the rest of the days are filled with simple things like ‘have a pajama day’, ‘make cookies’, ‘sip hot cocoa’, ‘watch a Christmas movie’.  The week of Thanksgiving I planned our countdown to Christmas activities by looking at things we already had on the calendar.  There are many nights I will do some late night switching because I realize we just aren’t going to ‘make cookies’ the next day.

I use this super simple Advent calendar to help us remember everyday the ‘why’ behind Christmas.

Tip: If you aren’t into Advent calendars or it’s just going to stress you out, it’s more than okay to say no to this one.

Fewer Gifts

If you follow this blog, you know we try and limit the amount of stuff coming into our home if we can help it.  Toys, too.  Two of our kids have birthdays in November, so they are already overloaded with stuff come Christmas.  Sometime before Luke was born I found a Christmas gift idea on Pinterest that included four gifts: something to wear, something to read, something you want, something you need.  We did this for a few years and while it seems simple enough, there were times Luke didn’t need anything to wear or there wasn’t anything he needed and it made it tough because I felt like I was buying things unnecessarily.

My mother-in-law told me about giving three gifts to each child to represent how Jesus received three gifts.  That is what we have done the past several years. Each kid will receive three gifts, no guidelines involved, just three gifts. They will also get their stockings filled with small consumables like new toothbrushes and a magazine to read on Christmas day (a new tradition this year).  This simple way of doing Christmas has worked well for us.  A bonus: Luke and Lily have picked up on this tradition.  They know they get three gifts and can tell us the exact gifts they want under the Christmas tree.

Margin on the Calendar

After a full fall, I have been wanting to create some margin on our calendar for this fun season.

In November, Kevin and I sat down and discussed what made Christmas feel like Christmas.  For me it is cutting down the tree, going to Lauritzen Gardens and the Durham Museum to see Santa.  It is having lots of time at home to watch Christmas movies, sing Christmas songs, make cookies and drink hot cocoa. Kevin simply said being home on Christmas together and giving things to people who need them. We also included the kids in it this year. Luke said he wants to build a snowman (come on snow!) and Lily says she wants to build a gingerbread house. Jude just said choo-choos and, lucky for us, we have lots of Christmas train options in Omaha.

Kevin and I sat down and mapped our Christmas season on the calendar and put in all the big things and little things.  This helps us visualize the month and also allows us to see if it’s all doable.

Since November, lots of fun, exciting things have come up to do or go to.  We have said ‘yes’ to some of them, but ‘no’ to lots of them.  It is oh so hard for me to say no to good, fun things, but I know if I want this season to be beautiful for my family, I must do it.

A last caveat to this…when I see a family on Facebook or Instagram doing something totally Christmas-y I…#1 do my best to not feel guilty about not doing said activity and #2 promise myself I will not add that incredible tradition to our plate this year.  Every family is different and none of us can do it all.

Simpler Mealtimes

We still have to eat!  Even in this full season, my people still need to eat breakfast, lunch, and dinner.  Madness.  Meal planning will save me this month.  Even though it’s tempting to put planning dinner on the back burner, I know I will pay for it if I don’t.  Soups and crock pot meals are my go to during this full Christmas season.  And no leftovers go to waste.  Some of my favorite meals I will be making this month: chili, change your life chicken, white chicken chili, and tacos (always tacos).

Giving Myself Grace

Christmas is one of my favorite times of the year and I want to take in as much as possible and enjoy the magic and wonder that fills December.  I love to read a Christmas book and watch Christmas movies on the couch cuddled under a blanket with a cup of peppermint hot cocoa.  I am giving myself permission and grace to do this the next few weeks during nap time or at night after the kids go to bed.  Besides, this season only comes around once a year.

As one of the best seasons comes to life around us, I want to slow down, take it in, and make as many memories as possible.  They may not be picture perfect and there might be tears intertwined with those memories because #life, but I’m thankful for this Christmas season nonetheless. Keeping it simple can help keep in focus the real reason for the season: the baby born to save the world.

Merry Christmas, everyone!  I hope your Christmas is merry, bright, and simple!

If you are not content today, there is nothing you can buy this week to change that. -Joshua Becker

Happy Thanksgiving week, friends! This week is all about the pie, the side dishes (anyone else live for mashed potatoes and stuffing?!), the football, and the quality time with the ones we love. I hope you have the very best Thanksgiving weekend!

With this week also comes Black Friday and I wanted to share some quick thoughts on contentment before the busiest shopping day of the year.

Contentment Thoughts

According to a Forbes article, Americans are estimated to spend about $730 billion this holiday season, beginning on Black Friday. We could feed all the hungry people in America for 6 years with all that cash. Yikes.

Contentment is defined as a state of happiness and satisfaction. I think we can all agree it can be hard to be content in America. Our culture, led by advertisers, tell us we need bigger, we need better, we need more. They lead us to believe if we can just purchase the upgraded phone (with three cameras!!!), we will take and share photographer-like pictures. They tell us if we shoulder the designer bag, we have ‘made it’. They beat us over the head with ‘fashion as unique as you are’, ‘ultimate driving machines’, and ‘a diamond is forever’.

I’m not saying we shouldn’t have nice things, I just think it is in our favor to be aware we are being fed advertisements at an alarming rate, especially leading up to Black Friday. In fact, Americans see anywhere between 4,000 and 10,000 advertisements everyday. And I would argue we are not immune to them.

Research shows contentment cannot be bought. Not with a phone, a bag, or a diamond. Instead, gratitude has been linked to happiness. Most studies done on the topic of gratitude and happiness support an association. Practicing gratitude is free (no coupon code needed) and can lead to contentment. This book helped me begin to notice and have gratitude for the simple things all around me. Simply acknowledging and noting things, people, and experiences to be grateful for can lead to a more contented life.

Earlier this week I completed a short exercise in order to be intentional with the weekend ahead. Here it is…

Make a list of priorities for the weekend.

I made a list of priorities for the weekend in order of importance and they include:

1. Spend time with friends and family and be fully present with my people.

2. Practice gratitude.

3. Eat good food.

4. Read.

5. Watch football with my family.

6. Do some online shopping for a few things still on my Christmas shopping list.

Check in throughout the weekend.

Over the next several days, I plan to check in with myself to see if my actions are aligned with the priorities on my list. If I find myself 10 minutes in to an Instagram scroll instead of reading the book on my nightstand, I hope I can point myself back to my priorities. If after my 10 minutes of scrolling Instagram, I find myself shopping (because of those pesky advertisements), I hope I can point myself back to my priorities.

Nothing I purchase on Black Friday will bring me contentment. Instead I can find contentment in my gratitude for family, relationships, and God. Today I am grateful for much. What are you grateful for this Thanksgiving?

The year of 2019 is coming to a close. We are smack dab in the middle of the holiday season, since it begins the day after Halloween (says every retail store in the States). The hustle and bustle of this magical season is upon us and I enjoy it all. The family and friend get togethers, all the baking, and the opportunity to get cozy under a blanket with a hot drink and a good book or a Christmas movie.

Sometimes it’s easy to let other things slide in my life with all the ‘extra’ things happening in November and December. Instead of making excuses this year, I want to finish strong and continue some habits I have been working on the past year and especially the past three months since Kevin and I do quarterly goals. I whole heartedly believe when I take care of myself, I am better able to take care of the ones I love.

For the next 6 1/2 weeks, I am going to continue to try and get more reading in. In this season, it’s been difficult for me to find time to read, but I discovered a big chunk of time while nursing Jack. Now nursing time is reading time. I want to continue my reading habit these last days of 2019. Another habit I want to continue is moving my body. For the next six weeks I want to move my body at least four times a week. I always feel good after a workout and I will feel better about eating the pie and mashed potatoes if I’m consistently moving my body during these holiday months.

There are lots of goals or habits anyone could implement or continue these next few months to not only finish 2019 strong, but make the holiday season a little more enjoyable. Here are a few more ways to finish strong.

Have a Morning Routine

Morning routines have helped me start the day well these past few years. Instead of being woken by my babes, I wake up before them to shower, workout, and have some devotional time. Right now it is pretty bare bones since I have a three month old, but in the past I have also gotten in some writing time and a cup of decaf coffee.

When life is full, a morning routine guarantees I can get the things in I really want to everyday.

Meal Plan

This season is chalk full of good things and sometimes it’s easy to let meal planning get put on the back burner. I always find if I meal plan for the week ahead, I feel less crazy and more in control as the week progresses. I’m also not scrambling every night around 5:00. Meal planning allows me to plan healthy meals which include real, actual vegetables instead of throwing crescent rolls and goldfish on a plate and calling it dinner (which happens from time to time).

Get good sleep

The National Sleep Foundation recommends 7-9 hours of sleep a night for adults. Ongoing sleep deficiency is linked to all kinds of bad stuff like high blood pressure, obesity, and even a stroke. The research paints a very clear picture that sleep is important, and yet it’s still hard to log the hours. I know I’m a better mom and wife when I’m well rested and in the holiday season my need for sleep is amplified. Making sleep a priority can improve one’s capacity for all the things November and December bring.

Practice presence

In the hustle and bustle of the season, taking a moment to really, truly be in the moment allows me to savor the beauty around me in a real way. It’ a simple concept only hard to implement. When I’m being intentional about this, I try and have one moment with each kid everyday. I know it sounds like a ridiculously trivial goal, but when I take time to look each babe in the eyes and really be with them, it makes a big impact. (This was a good reread for me.)

Presence with our loved ones is one of the lovely things about this season and I don’t want to miss it.

Stop the Scrolling

Screentime. Ugh. One requirement for me being present with my people is putting my phone down. Intentionality when it comes to our phones couldn’t be more important during this season. Yes, I want to take pictures. Yes, I want to post them. Yes, I want to see how my friends are celebrating. No, I don’t want that to be my priority for the six weeks. Maybe a Social Media Sabbath will help. Limiting my scrolling will make me a happier and more present Momma.

What are some ways you can finish the year strong these next several weeks?

It was Christmas Eve circa 199_ and I was anticipating the following day like any typical American kid on Christmas Eve. I was excited for it all, the gifts especially. My mom always made Christmas feel magical. Her love language is gifts and it shines bright on Christmas. I knew I would probably get the things I wanted as I drifted off to sleep that night. On the big day, we were knee deep in wrapping paper and we got everything we dreamed along with some money to go shopping. A few days later we piled into the car to go shopping a town away. The 30 minute drive turned into a few hours and my parents played it off as if they were lost. They pulled into a hotel parking lot and my mom went inside to ‘ask for directions’. We were too young to catch on. A few minutes later she came out and said we were staying in the hotel for the night and going shopping. We went to the mall and were able to pick out anything we wanted and although it was fun to spend my own money, I most remember experiencing it all with my family. The hotel, the pool, the fancy glass elevator doors, the shopping together. It’s probably the Christmas I remember the most in my parent’s home. It was most definitely magical.

Fast forward a little over twenty years later and I am in charge of the Christmas magic in our home. Like my mom, I truly enjoy gift giving. It brings me joy to give gifts to the people I love. Being in charge of Christmas in our household makes me happy, but can also become a burden if I let it be. Over the years, I have learned some ways to simplify gift giving from friends, writers, and a whole lot of trial and error. These three ways to simplify gift giving have saved me time, energy, and my sanity during the magical Christmas season. Most importantly, because they have helped to save my time and energy, I am able to use those precious resources on the my family and focusing my attention on the reason for the season: the baby in the manger.

Most of you already know about my Christmas Plan, so you already know I am close to completing my Christmas shopping. These things have helped make my shopping lots easier.

3 Gifts

When I first started having babies, we did four gifts at Christmas. Something to wear, something to read, something you want, something you need. That worked for awhile, but then I discovered my kids didn’t always need things that fit into those specific categories. Now we do three gifts for each kid (and separate stockings) based on Jesus’ three gifts from the wise men. My mother-in-law does this as well and I may have talked my mom into it this year, too! #allthepraisehands

The average American will spend approximately $700 on Christmas gifts this year. My husband and I’s focus the last several years has been on quality over quantity. Instead of giving my kids 20 small things that will break or get tossed the first few months, we want to give them things of quality. The three gifts Kevin and I choose for our kids are thoughtful and special and tailored to them.

If your family is wanting to implement three gifts this year, but have done big Christmases in the past with lots of presents, it might be good to have some conversations leading up to the big day so everyone has the same expectations. Almost like clock work, every Christmas Eve I look at Kevin in a panic and think we don’t have enough presents under the tree. He talks me off the cliff and of course the kids are thrilled with the presents they receive and it is always enough. Implementing three gifts is one way to simplify Christmas gift giving.

Exchanges

Anyone else feel like there are so many gifts exchanges with so many different groups of people? Me too. I enjoy them, but sometimes they can be a little overwhelming. Below are a few ways to make exchanges simpler.

If you don’t want to participate in an exchange, don’t.

It’s okay to get off the hamster wheel. It’s definitely okay to opt out of a gift exchange for any reason. Just be sure to give the group or person a heads up that you aren’t going to participate. When one of my cousins and I started having babies, she asked if we could stop exchanging gifts and focus our attention more on the kids. I was thrilled and was so glad she brought it up. Communication is important. Stepping away from an exchange can be hard, but if it saves your sanity, it’s worthwhile.

Instead of buying something for everyone in the group, do a favorite thing.

A good friend recently brought up this idea in a friend group. We all usually bring small gifts for one another and she asked if everyone would be okay bringing one favorite thing instead. YES! It simplified shopping and this way everyone goes home with one really nice thing.

Ask

Okay, so this one is super simple. Ask people what they want. I ask my kids and husband what they want, I ask my parents what they want. I ask nieces and nephews what they want. It takes the guess work out of the ‘perfect gift’. There are times I want to get something special for someone that I think they will really like and then other times I will just ask. And I don’t think it’s lazy or not thoughtful this way. In fact, I think it’s super thoughtful to ask someone you love what they want. This way you aren’t wasting money on something they aren’t going to enjoy and they aren’t having to think about what they are going to do with something they didn’t want in the first place.

Gift giving doesn’t have to be drudgery. It can be fun and light and simpler with a few tweaks here and there. Tell me: how do you make gift giving simpler in your home?

Yes, it’s October. Yes, we haven’t celebrated Halloween, yet. Yes, I am going to be THAT person talking about Christmas before the jack-o-lanterns have even been carved. But friends, it’s all intentional.

A year ago I was talking to a sweet momma at MOPS and she told me she finishes her Christmas shopping before Thanksgiving. At the time I thought it was a little extreme, but the more I thought about it, the more it resonated with me. Why wouldn’t I have a Christmas Plan a few months in advance so I can enjoy and be in the moment for the actual season?

So this is the year. This is the year I have a Christmas Plan. As I write this, I am 50% done Christmas shopping and have been readying my pantry and thinking through our Christmas calendar. I want to be present with my people during the magical month of December and having a Christmas Plan will help me in that endeavor.

Plans help us achieve what we want to achieve. They allow us to be intentional with our actions so we can go where we want to go. A plan isn’t always necessary, but sometimes it is. I don’t need a plan for what I’m going to do at rest time each day (although it sure helps). But, I should probably have a plan when taking our family of six to Disney World.

For our family, Christmas is a big deal in our family. It’s a little like Disney World. It may or may not be in yours. If it is, I would argue a Christmas Plan helps make the holiday much more enjoyable and a lot less stressful.

Here is what I am doing to prepare for the magical Christmas season.

Christmas Shopping

I have a Christmas list spreadsheet I have been using for six years now. It outlines in detail who I am buying for, what I am buying, and the cost of the gift. My list has been edited over the years with kid additions, but the bones have stayed the same. Each year I copy and paste the previous year’s spreadsheet into a new tab and then add people if needed. In the past I have done this at the end of October, but this year has been different. I opened it early September and started making plans for my Christmas gift buying.

Like I said previously, I am about 50% done with shopping. The last gifts I need to buy are mostly for my own babes. My hope is to be done before December 1 and I think it’s realistic at this point.

A few things I have found to be helpful in buying Christmas gifts.

#1 Start early.

For years I have shopped year round and kept bought gifts in my ‘GIFTS’ tub. Although I have done that this year as well, I am crossing many gifts off sooner. The earlier I have my list in hand, the quicker and easier my shopping becomes. My spreadsheet holds every person I will buy for along with the gift and cost. This keeps me accountable to stay on budget, to shop intentionally, and helps me avoid impulse purchases at Target.

#2 Get the same gifts for groups of people.

This has been sanity saving for me. I get the same gifts for various groups of people. For example, I enjoy giving small gifts to my MOPS table and giving the same gift just makes sense. We also like to give gifts to some of the kids’ friends. This year they are each getting the same book. This small Christmas hack makes Christmas shopping a bit simpler and I still believe people feel thought of and loved in the giving.

#3 Shop online.

This isn’t rocket science, but it is smart. Most of the shopping I have already done has been online. I have shopped small and shopped Amazon. (Some of my favorite small shops are: Alice and Adams, Littlefield Co., Wax Buffalo, and May Designs.) When those packages come in the mail, I simply place them in my ‘GIFT’ tub that lives in my master closet. I will wrap all the gifts when the time gets closer because it is something I enjoy. My Thursday and Friday afternoons in December will be spent watching Christmas movies and wrapping gifts.

Readying the Home

No, my Christmas decorations are not up. Decorating for December brings me joy, so I am going to wait to enjoy that with my family after Thanksgiving and into December. What I have been doing is readying my pantry and purging unneeded items to prepare for the Christmas holiday.

The Christmas Calendar

We all know the month of December can fill up fast. Last year we made a list of things we wanted to do as a family. This year we did the same and they are currently on the calendar. In October. We won’t be scrambling to find time to do certain activities together because we already know when we are cutting down our tree and heading to the Durham. It’s on the calendar.

Another perk of including the calendar in the Christmas Plan is it allows us to know what we can and can’t do when things come up. If a party comes up in December, it will be easy to tell if we can do it or not. It’s impossible to do everything in December, so knowing what we do want to do and planning ahead allows us to make space for it.

Christmas Traditions

I am a sucker for Christmas traditions. They give me all the warm, fuzzy feelings and I can’t help but appreciate them all. However, I know myself and how I can get overwhelmed easily. I know myself and know I can’t do all the Christmas traditions. I know myself and what will work and won’t work for our family. This year I made a list of traditions our family will do and won’t do. I honestly think there is a bit more power in making the ‘won’t’ list than making the ‘will’ list.

We will…

We will go to a tree farm and cut down our Christmas tree.

We will read as many Christmas books as possible and watch as many Christmas movies as possible in December.

We will go to the Durham and take pictures with Santa and the giant Christmas tree.

We will do a Simple Advent calendar complete with 3 acts of kindness.

We will make a Christmas cake for Jesus.

We will make Christmas cookies (even if Pillsbury makes the dough).

We won’t…

We won’t make any elaborate meals for Christmas day.

We won’t do Elf on the Shelf.

We won’t make it to every party or community event.

We won’t do a Christmas photo shoot with a photographer.

We won’t look to Facebook or Instagram for what we ‘should’ be doing in December.

We won’t do an act of kindness everyday (but it’s a goal when my kids get older).

As someone who sometimes struggles with FOMO, I know this Christmas traditions ‘will’ and ‘won’t’ list will come in handy. If you make a list as well, please know your list will be different than mine and that’s 1000% the way it should be! It’s quite possible a tradition I desire for my family will not be one you desire for your’s. THERE IS NO RIGHT WAY TO DO CHRISTMAS. #amen

I yearn for a little more magic in my Christmas and a little less hectic. I am hopeful having a Christmas Plan will allow me to be more present during the month of December with my people. Tell me: will you have a Christmas Plan for the upcoming season? Do you have any tips or tricks you do to make Christmas a bit more magical? I would love to hear!

Sometimes we make things harder than they need to be. Like going into the store with four kids to get groceries instead of ordering online. Or cloth diapering. Or making beef bourguignon from scratch instead of going to the nearest French restaurant. Some of these things are worth the effort and some aren’t, depending on your preferences and priorities.

In this season of raising four babes at home, all under six, priorities are spoken of often. With limited resources in time and energy and dollars, my husband and I try to use those resources as intentionally as possible, especially in the midst of these sleep deprived days.

Opening our home up to friends and family is a priority for us. We have a unique situation in that we live on a farm and our neighbors aren’t close. Many people who come to our home are driving anywhere from 5 to 65 minutes to get to us. #blessthem

I am currently writing this post in a darkened room before 7:00 a.m. when all my babies will wake. I am in a season of so much good, getting the privilege to raise and school my littles at home. In this season I want and need people around me, both to encourage me and I to encourage them. God purposed us to live in community and hospitality helps foster that way of life.

Hospitality looks a lot different today than it did pre-kids. It looks like playdates and smashed goldfish. It looks like hide and go seek and popsicles in the backyard. It looks like a gifted latte and blueberry crisp. It looks like store bought cookies and a football game. It looks a lot simpler and a lot less complicated these days.

Hospitality doesn’t have to be extravagant or fussy. It doesn’t have to be a made-from-scratch meal or a meal at all. It doesn’t have to be hard or difficult or cause us to clean our entire house top to bottom with a baby on our hip. It doesn’t have to be any of those things because at the core of hospitality is friendship and kindness and generosity, not food or new throw pillows or a clean house.

Here are some ways I keep my sanity and still invite people into our home and into our lives.

Simpler Hospitality

Host often.

This sounds backwards, but it’s true. I have found the more I have people into my home, the easier it is to do it again and again and again. I have slowly built muscle memory on what it takes and what needs to be done or doesn’t need to be done when friends come over for dinner or a playdate.

Do it early in the day.

I am best at the beginning of the day. I have more energy and am a happier version of myself. This also goes for my kids. Whenever possible, I try and host things in the morning or early afternoon. Sometimes it isn’t possible say for a football game or bonfire after the sun sets and that’s okay. But if I can, I do it early in the day when we all are fresh.

If there is a meal, keep it simple.

If it’s a playdate, macaroni and cheese and chicken nuggets. Sometimes grilled cheese. If it’s dinner, my go-to recipes are change your life chicken, a crockpot soup, or pizza. Hospitality isn’t about the food, it’s about the friendship. Gathering together can be life giving without a three course meal.

Stock the pantry and freezer.

I always have a few things on hand to host a last minute playdate or friend drop in. This has been especially important for us because we live about 25 minutes from town. Since I usually make macaroni and cheese and chicken nuggets for playdates, I always have those items in my pantry and freezer. I love baked goods for the mommas during a playdate, so I try and have some muffins or banana bread in the freezer as well. The list of ingredients for change your life chicken is super short, so chicken thighs are in my freezer and sweet potatoes are in my pantry. And in a pinch, Casey’s is right down the road for pizza pick up. Keeping items on hand to feed people keeps the stress low when I want to invite friends over.

Clean these three things.

When I am hosting, I make sure three things are done if I can (this doesn’t always happen with playdates). Clean the toilet. Wipe down the counters. Sweep or vacuum around the outside edges of the main living area where the crumbs congregate. If those three things are done, the rest can go undone and it’s not a big deal (mostly).

Enjoy people.

When it’s finally time for guests to come over, my main purpose is to enjoy them. To listen. To engage. To be present. After all, the whole purpose of hospitality is friendship and I want to be a good friend to my people. Sometimes this means I leave the dishes for after my guests leave and sometimes it means the kids go down late for naps. I want to be sure I enjoy the people who enter into my home.

Hospitality doesn’t have to be over complicated or a lot of work. It can simply mean friends gathering around a bowl of macaroni and cheese or slices of pizza engaging in one another’s lives.

A personal goal I have is to invite entire families over more often. Inviting friends over for playdates and big get togethers comes naturally to me, but inviting a family over for dinner hasn’t been my cup of tea. Maybe it’s because we live in the middle of nowhere, maybe it’s because our evenings fill up. I can give lots of excuses, but I want to intentionally invite a family into our home more often.

How can you make hospitality simpler and be intentional with inviting others into your home and your life?