5 Ways to Intentionally Love Our Kids

This month is all about L-O-V-E. Although we don’t need a holiday to love our people, it gives us a good reason to get intentional about loving the ones closest to us, specifically our kids. I want to be super clear, these are things I am hoping to work on this month and the rest of the year. I’m preaching to my own little heart choir here. Let’s talk 5 Ways to Intentionally Love Our Kids.

5 Ways to Intentionally Love Our Kids

Listen.

I know this seems silly and obvious, but I think sometimes as parents we don’t do this enough. Listen to their stories, their tales, all the seemingly unimportant stuff. Listen to their annoyances, their fears, their plights for justice. I know we’ve all heard this quote: Listen to anything your children want to tell you. If you don’t listen to the small stuff now, they won’t tell you the big stuff later.

Let’s love our kids by listening to the small stuff.

Play.

This is a hard one for me. Not because I don’t like playing with my kids, but because I have four kids and they all play together while I do alllll the things. But whenever I make time to play with my kids, I get the gift of seeing the world through their eyes. I get to see the magic, the wonder, the silly. And as much as it fills me up, I know it does the same or more for them. I want to be clear, I’m not talking about entertaining our kids. I’m talking about entering in to their made up game or imaginary world. It doesn’t have to be hours of play, 15 minutes is a good place to start.

Let’s love our kids through play.

Build Up.

It’s so easy to get caught up in the things our kids aren’t doing. He isn’t picking up his room. He isn’t being kind to his sister. She isn’t doing her best on her school work. Although these things can be frustrating and will need addressing, let’s choose to focus on building up our kids. When we see one of our kids doing something kind or loving, let’s notice it. When we see a child working hard on some homework, let’s encourage it. And when we build our kids up, let’s use specific language. Instead of ‘Good job!’ Let’s use: ‘Wow, you are working so hard to get your school work completed today.’ Or: ‘Look at the way you put away your toys. I can tell you took your time to do it right.’

Let’s love our kids by building them up.

Do something together.

Shared experiences bring people closer. Find something you and your kid or kids can do together. Maybe it’s playing a card game (this gets played A LOT around here) or building a snowman. Maybe you read a novel together, paint a picture, or have a dance party. Or maybe you invite your kids into the kitchen to help you make a snack or meal. Find something you can do together and be present while you’re doing the thing.

Let’s love our kids by doing something together.

Date.

If you have multiple kids, chances are one on one time can sometimes be hard to come by. Let’s make time for it and date our kids. It doesn’t have to be fancy or extravagant. Simply playing a game with a child in their room without interruption can be a date. Having your spouse watch the other kids while taking a walk with a child is another way to get in some one on one time. And, of course, you can take your kid to dinner, ice cream, or a museum, too. Let’s not overcomplicate it. Keep it simple and make it work.

Let’s love our kids by dating our kids.

Intentionality helps us do the things we want to do. These 5 Ways to Intentionally Love Our Kids is simply a place to begin. How will you love your kids today?