Vanessa

Christmas Gift Challenge

A Simpler Motherhood

The calendar has turned over to November, which means Christmas is sneaking up on us. Last year I did a Christmas Gift Challenge and I’m back for another round.

The Christmas Gift Challenge is this: Purchase all Christmas gifts before Thanksgiving. Last year I completed my shopping before December 1 and this year I am hoping to wrap it up before Thanksgiving.

One thing I have learned the past nine years of being a mom: Do things today that will make life easier tomorrow. My why for the Christmas Gift Challenge is this: If I purchase my Christmas gifts early, my December self is less stressed and more able to rest and savor the Christmas season.

The Christmas Gift Challenge simply means setting a goal for when you would like to be done Christmas shopping. Maybe it’s before Thanksgiving like me. Maybe it’s by December 1. Or maybe you like going to the stores in December and want to have your shopping all wrapped up the week before Christmas. We all have different preferences and life situations and finding what works for us specifically is important.

Here are the steps I’m walking through for my Christmas Gift Challenge:

Christmas Gift Challenge

Make a list

We need to make a list before we can start purchasing Christmas gifts. Make it and check it twice. I use an Excel spreadsheet every year, but a notebook or the Notes app will work, too. Include everyone you will purchase a gift for: grandparents, nieces, nephews, the mailman, your Starbucks barista. Leave no one out.

Set a budget

Setting a budget is important if we don’t want to go into debt during the holidays. If you’ve never set a budget, now is the time to do it. I set a budget for the whole of Christmas, but also on individual gifts. These boundaries help me shop and make sure I know how much I have to spend and where I want to spend it.

Shop

Once we have done the work of making the list and setting the budget, it’s time to shop. I do most of my shopping online, but will pick up some things in the stores in mid November. I utilize Amazon, of course, but I also like to shop small when I can. Charli Dean Designs, Doe a Deer, and Wax Buffalo are a few of my favorite spots to find special Christmas gifts.

Store the goods

Since many of us are shopping early, we need a place to store the goods. We don’t want to have to turn the house upside down in search of Great Grandma’s gift when we start wrapping gifts. My master bedroom closet is where I keep all the gifts. I will be real and say the closet gets a bit stuffed in November, but I make it work and I’m grateful gifts aren’t scattered throughout the house, especially when it’s time to wrap.

Don’t forget the wrapping

It’s easy to overlook the wrapping. One of my favorite things is wrapping gifts on December afternoons with a Hallmark Christmas movie playing in the background. I will save the wrapping for December, but I will make sure I have my wrapping supplies ahead of time.

The Christmas Gift Challenge can be tailored to meet your goals, preferences, and holiday life. If getting finished by Thanksgiving isn’t your thing, don’t do it. Set your own goal that makes sense for you and will make life easier for your Christmas self.

If we make a plan now for Christmas gifts, we will be more able to be present and enjoy the season with the ones we love. Will you join me in the Christmas Gift Challenge this year?

Vanessa

Christmas Prep

A Simpler Home, A Simpler Motherhood

You’re reading that right. It’s October and we are talking Christmas Prep. I know we haven’t stalked the neighbors for trick or treat candy, yet, but the holidays always always sneak up on us. Today I’m sharing some ways to Christmas Prep the next few weeks so we can experience more joy and less stress this Christmas season.

I’m on Year 3 of prepping and planning early for Christmas. (See Year 1 and Year 2) And friends, it’s probably one of the best things I do for my December self. I usually begin Christmas Prep in September, sometimes August. Starting early has allowed me to have some of the best Decembers of my adult life. Starting Christmas Prep early allows me to be intentional with how I want to spend December and how much stress I allow to enter our home during the most magical time of the year.

Some of these ideas could work for you and some won’t make sense for your family. Take what works and leave the rest.

Here are a few ways I Christmas Prep:

Christmas Prep

Gifts

Gifts are one of the first things that come to mind when thinking about Christmas. The biggest thing we can do right now to Christmas Prep in the area of gifts is to make a list, set a budget, and brainstorm ideas for loved ones. I use the same excel spreadsheet year to year, simply adding a new tab for each new year. If Excel isn’t your thing, a notebook or even the Notes app will do the job. In the spreadsheet I list the people to buy for, the budget for the gift, and the idea for the gift.

There are a few things I have found helpful when brainstorming and purchasing Christmas gifts.

Begin Early

We don’t have to stand in long lines in December if we don’t want to. The first year I shopped early, I was floored by how much more time I had in December. Did you know the average woman spends 20 hours Christmas shopping each year? If we save all that shopping for December, that’s a part time job for a whole week. By beginning Christmas shopping early, we are able to spread out the shopping and have more time for what matters in December.

Batch Shop

I don’t know if this is an actual term or if I just made it up. Batch shopping is buying a similar gift or genre of gift for a specific group of people. There are a couple ways to do this.

One way to batch shop is to gift the same gift to a group of people. For example, all the kids’ teachers receive a Starbucks gift card and a plate of homemade cookies or all the cousins receive a book and a pair of cozy slippers.

Another way to batch shop is to give the same genre of gift to a group of people. For example, every child receives a book, but the book reflects their passions or preferences. Another example is gifting a dinner out to your siblings and parents, tailoring it to their favorite restaurant.

Batch shopping reduces decision fatigue, simplifies shopping, while still making friends and family members feel loved.

Buy less gifts

I’m hesitant to mention this one, but here I go. If you want a little less stress this Christmas, think about having conversations now about opting out of exchanges or changing them up. Consider foregoing exchanges between adult sibling groups or doing a ‘favorite things’ exchange with a friend group instead of buying gifts for everyone. Most of us have what we need and want and a lot of these gift exchanges turn into returns on January 2nd. I think it’s safe to say many of us have returned a gift from a well intentioned family member.

If we want a little less stress this Christmas, let’s begin a conversation now about opting out or simplifying gift exchanges this Christmas.

Readying the Pantry and Freezer

For the next few weeks, I am readying our pantry and freezer by using up food items currently housed on the shelves. I am buying less groceries and using what we have so we can stock up on all the holiday goodies when the time comes.

A few weeks before Thanksgiving, I will stock up on all the baking supplies I usually use during the holidays: flour, sugar, chocolate chips, sprinkles, pie crusts, peanut butter, vanilla. I also stock up on ingredients for comfort food: butternut squash, bacon, chicken stock, and yeast for bread.

Readying our home now takes one thing off my plate later.

The Christmas Calendar

I know it seems premature to start making Christmas plans in October. However, I would argue that if we don’t set our priorities as a family and make our plans now, someone else could do it for us come December. This past weekend, Kevin and I sat down and talked through our family’s holiday priorities. We put those priorities on the calendar. In October.

One thing I am going to test out this year is writing REST on the calendar. I wrote REST on 7 days in December and I am hopeful this will help us be intentional with not trying to do alllll the things. Even though Instagram and Facebook tempt and tease us with the possibility of doing the next fun, festive thing, it’s impossible to do it all. Impossible. Rest is imperative all the time, but especially during the holidays. It allows us to be more present with the ones we love and supplies us with energy for all the fun Christmas things.

Traditions

Anyone else love Christmas traditions? I love a good tradition, especially a Christmas one. I am a sucker for window shopping traditions and then trying them out to see if they fit. However, this usually ends poorly, in the manner of an over-stressed mom (me) juggling too many advent calendar activities or cookie recipes.

Last year I decided to make a will and will not list for traditions. These are traditions our family will and will not do together. For me, there is definitely power in the will not list.

Our family will…

Go to a tree farm to pick out our tree and decorate it together.

Deliver gifts to our neighbors.

Host our annual gingerbread party.

Read a Christmas book each day.

Go to the Durham Museum to look at the big tree.

Make a birthday cake for Jesus.

Our family will not…

Do elf on the shelf.

Wrap a book up for each day in December.

Visit every Santa sighting.

Let Facebook and Instagram talk me into more traditions.

This will not list will help with my inevitable FOMO during the Christmas season. My lists will be different from your lists and that’s the way it should be. There is no right way to do Christmas.

I yearn for a little more joy and a lot less stress this Christmas season. I want to be present for my people and have time and space to celebrate the reason for the season: the baby born to save the world. My hope is some Christmas Prep now will help get me there.

Will you Christmas Prep this year?

Vanessa

Intentional Birthdays

A Simpler Childhood, A Simpler Motherhood

Birthday month is coming up for our family. My two bigs have birthdays in November along with my mom and father in law. We like a reason to celebrate at our house, so the next month is going to be good. Although we celebrate big, we are intentional with how we celebrate. Today I’m sharing a few ways to have Intentional Birthdays.

Intentional Birthdays

Fewer Gifts, More Experiences

Every family has different values. For us, we value experiences over stuff. That is not right or wrong, it’s just what our family prioritizes. This year, we asked our two big kids if they would rather have gifts from us or go on a mini getaway to Great Wolf Lodge. Luke and Lily chose the latter and so we are headed to swim for a few days to celebrate.

They will still receive gifts from grandparents and a few other close, loved ones. We will celebrate them, it will just look a little different. The gifts will be in the form of time together instead of something wrapped in a package.

Birthdays at your house don’t have to look like our’s, but I think it’s helpful to get clear on what you do want them to look like. Big party? Fun gifts? Family experiences? What do you want your family culture to be surrounding birthday celebrations?

Intentional Time

One thing we make sure happens during kid birthdays is spending one on one time with the birthday kid. A date with Mom and Dad is on the calendar and we are sure to give the birthday kid our undivided time and attention. Believe it or not, this is semi-hard to make happen, but it’s always worth it.

How can you set aside intentional time for the human whose birthday you are celebrating?

Celebration Journals

Several years back I found keeping track of birthday cards to be difficult. Kevin and I started using celebration journals instead of getting each other cards and it has expanded to our kids. Every person in our family has a celebration journal (similar to this). We write a note in their journal when their special day comes around. The journal keeps everything from past years together and it’s fun to go back and read old entries from birthdays and other celebrations. We also use these for anniversaries, holidays, or when we just want to write a note to our kids on a random Tuesday. Celebration Journals give us a simplified way to tell the people we love that we love them.

Are celebration journals a tool that makes sense for your family?

Celebrating another year of life is special and sacred and worthy. How can you be intentional with birthday celebrations at your house?

Vanessa

What I’m Loving in October

A Simpler Motherhood

Fall is all around us. I’m not sure where September went, but October is here and it’s pretty nice, too. There is so much to love about this time of year. Today I’m sharing What I’m Loving in October.

What I’m Loving in October

Cozy Clothes

Fall is pretty pleasant when it comes to weather and so what I put on my body also seems pretty pleasant. Leggings and snug tops are my go to right now. Soft sweatshirts and sharpa pull overs are my favorite. I pair them with either rain boots or tennis shoes and I am cozy all day long.

The Anticipation of Halloween

Halloween is a fun holiday at our house. Although we don’t get into all the gore, our family looks forward to dressing up each year together. It is a highlight of our fall and I’m excited for our costumes this year. Stay tuned.

Pumpkin Muffins

Pumpkin muffins are my favorite fall food. The ones I make are more like a cupcake, but I’m okay with it. I make these year round, but they are especially delicious in the fall. This is the only pumpkin muffin recipe you will ever need: Pumpkin Muffins

Preparing for Christmas

I know it’s only October, but I’ve been prepping and planning for the holiday season. I am not someone who listens to Christmas music until after Thanksgiving, but I have been shopping and planning for the most wonderful time of year the past month. In the next few weeks I will share more about how I prepare for Christmas.

October is the beginning of all the fun, festive days. What are you loving in October?

Vanessa

Mins Game Recap

A Simpler Motherhood

Well, friends, I made it through the Mins Game and this is my Mins Game Recap. I decluttered 465+ things from our home. That doesn’t include all the stuff my kids and husband decluttered. While they didn’t make it as long as I did, it was a team effort and a lot of stuff left our home in September. We all feel lighter.

It seemed fitting to wrap up the Mins Game on my husband’s birthday: September 30. We celebrated him big and I made a semi-corny toast to my family for the way they love me and roll with my crazy ideas. They’re the best.

Mins Game Takeaway

While I could analyze and synthesize the things I learned the past month, it all boils down to this:

Our family is blessed with more than enough.

Our family has what we need to live a full life. We have enough clothes for our bodies and food for our bellies. We have a warm, cozy home to enjoy dinners around the table and restful sleep at night. Unlike many, we have toilet paper and running water and dishes and toys and computers and pillows and books and…each other. Most importantly, we have each other.

While I slowly let go of a lot this past month, when I really think about it, none of it matters. None of it matters as much as the people amongst the stuff. The Minimalists say: Love people, use things. And if I re-learned anything this month, it’s that mantra.

I could play the Mins Game every month for the next year and still have enough. Because I would still be with my people and we would still have clothes and a home and food. And that is enough.

While I absolutely am not going to do that (Kevin cheers), I gain comfort knowing my value, my future, my hope, my life is not found in the stuff in my home. It’s in my faith and the people I love. My people.

We are blessed with enough.

Vanessa

Simple Ways to Enjoy Fall

A Simpler Motherhood

Here in the midwest, fall is a time when rhythms return and the weather becomes pleasantly perfect for a small window of time. It’s my favorite. Let’s talk some Simple Ways to Enjoy Fall.

Simple Ways to Enjoy Fall

Fall Food

One way I savor each season is with food. The Nester talks about welcoming the seasons with our senses and food is one way to do that. Also, we love to eat at our house. I recently made a list of all the fall meals I like to make this time of year. Change your life chicken, butternut squash soup, chicken pot pie, chili, roasted chicken and veggies, and tacos (always tacos) are a few on the list. Zucchini bread, pumpkin muffins, and apple crisp are a few more fall foods that are coming out of our oven often in the fall.

What are some foods that feel like fall to you? Make a list of your favorite fall meals and stock your fridge, freezer, and pantry with items to make those foods all season long.

Outings

The beautiful weather this time of year is reason enough to put some outings on the calendar. Apple orchards, pumpkin patches, a bike ride on a crisp Saturday morning, a coffee and park date, a fall themed Trader Joe’s run, a drive or hike to look at pretty autumn leaves. These are some of the outings we are planning to enjoy this fall.

Let each family member choose somewhere they want to go this fall and put it on the calendar. We all know this time of year can fill up fast, so getting it on the calendar will ensure it happens.

Books

Anytime of the year is a good time to snuggle up with a good book, but fall is a special one. We love to read books that go along with the seasons. Some of my favorite children’s books for this time of year are: Goodbye Summer Hello Autumn, Applesauce Day, The Apple Pie that Papa Baked, and The Legend of Spookly the Square Pumpkin.

Check out Read Aloud Revival for some books lists for September, October, and November. Pull out some of your long time favorite fall books to read as a family. Or head to the library and ask your librarian for some recommendations. Books are a great way to savor this season.

Get cozy

Soft, thick blankets, textured pillows, a yummy smelling candle, cozy socks. In our home, I slowly change pillows, throws, and candles out as the days get cooler. My rhythms change as I light a candle in the morning before the sun rises and in the evening when the sun sets. I switch from iced coffee to a hot cup.

Think about what makes you feel cozy this time of year and make it come alive in your home and your days.

There are so many simple ways to enjoy fall. How will you celebrate the everyday this season?

Vanessa

What I’m Loving in September

A Simpler Motherhood

Fall officially begins this week. Shorter days, crisp multi-colored leaves, and a month or so of beautiful, perfect weather (fingers crossed). September seems to be another new year, ushering in a fresh start and a time to begin again. There is so much to love right now, so let’s get to it. Here is what I’m loving in September.

What I’m Loving in September

Afternoon Walks

This summer I was taking early morning walks to watch the sunrise. Since the sun isn’t rising until after my day has begun, I have switched to afternoon walks while my kids are at quiet time. It would be easy to let my walks fall away, but I have realized I enjoy them so much. The only person who can make my walks happen is me, so (almost) everyday from 3:00-3:30 I walk. For me, it is time well spent.

Warm Coffee and Homemade Syrup

The mornings have been cooler and I don’t mind it one bit. Having a cup of coffee late morning is one of my favorite things. I recently made my own homemade syrup using brown sugar, water, vanilla, and cinnamon and it is better than I anticipated. I use my Nespresso to make a warm (usually decaf) latte after school and it’s one way I celebrate the everyday, ordinary things.

New sneakers

I had been wearing the same sneakers for several years and they were thoroughly scuffed and ready to be retired. I actually let go of them on Day 3 of A Simpler Motherhood Mins Game. I found my new pair at Evereve and am enjoying them so much. My kids call them ‘touch and feel shoes’ because there are different textures: suede, faux leather, and a furry animal print. They are a bit more fun than my usual plain, black sneakers, which will add some interest to my basic fall and winter wardrobe.

Love People Use Things by Joshua Fields Millburn & Ryan Nicodemus

This new book by The Minimalists is so good. The mantra Love People Use Things is something that can be forgotten quickly in our consumer driven world. I believe most of us 100% agree with loving people and using things, but it’s easy to forget. The mantra and book is a nod to what is really important and living our lives to reflect that.

Mins Game

I have been playing the Mins Game this September and it has been super fun. Decluttering the unnecessary to make room for the necessary always feels good. If I’m being honest, I have been a bit overwhelmed this fall with alllllllll the things. This game has given me something fun and purposeful to look forward to. For those of you playing with me, I hope it’s been inspiring for you as well.

What have you been loving in September?

Vanessa

30 Minute Purge

A Simpler Home

There are times when our homes can suddenly become overwhelming. Except it didn’t happen so suddenly. Piles of papers, a mountain of who-knows-what in the entry way, strewn plastic toys that seem to magically appear from the floorboards. Let’s rally the troops and do a 30 minute purge to put the overwhelm to bed.

A 30 Minute Purge will not get us a completely clutter free and organized home. What is that anyways? It will, however, give us some breathing room both physically and mentally and could give us the motivation we need to keep going.

If you’re playing the Mins Game with me this month, a 30 Minute Purge is just the thing to do September 20-30 when we are decluttering more than just a few items. Here is one way to do a 30 Minute Purge.

30 Minute Purge

Gather supplies.

Grab three trash bags or boxes. The boxes or sacks can be labeled trash, donate, and relocate. That’s all you need to do a 30 minute purge. The only other thing you may want is some ear buds and your favorite podcast or playlist.

Choose to focus on one room or the whole house

Decide now if you want to focus on one trouble area or do a whole house walk through. One room will you get you a lot of bang for your buck and a whole house walk through will give your home a surface level declutter. Both are good, neither is wrong.

One Room 30 Minute Purge

If you are focusing on one room get to that room, set a timer for 30 minutes, and begin. Because we only have 30 minutes, we will not be taking everything out or touching every item in the space. Simply find things in the space that can be trashed, donated, or need to go to another room. Place that stuff in the correct trash bag or box.

Make a pact with yourself that you will make ruthless decisions and not let yourself feel guilty for items you need to give away or trash because you spent money on them or someone gave them to you. This is your home and you deserve to have a calm and peaceful space. This 30 Minute Purge is guilt free.

If you have time left after decluttering, group like items together and give your stuff a home. When our things have homes, they are easier to find and use. Some people call this organization. When we have only what we need and use and have it in a home easy to find, our lives become a bit simpler.

Whole House 30 Minute Purge

Maybe your entire house is driving you batty and you need to remove some of the surface level clutter. Set a timer, take one trash bag and begin in your kitchen or living room. Start with surfaces and throw anything in the bag that isn’t serving you or your family. Make quick decisions as you move through the spaces and clear clutter and trash. Walk through the rest of your house, clearing clutter and trash in bedrooms, bathrooms, and other shared spaces.

Be sure to ask other members of your family if it’s okay to get rid of their stuff. Or better yet, give your kids a grocery sack and have them declutter 10 things in their rooms.

When the timer goes off, sort your trash bag. Throw trash away, put things to be donated in your trunk, and take other items back to their homes.

Pat yourself on the back.

30 minutes spent purging is time well spent. Reward yourself with an iced coffee, a walk around the block, or (my favorite) closing your eyes for 5 minutes. Let’s celebrate the 30 minute purge we completed to make our homes cozy and comfortable for us and our people.

Tell me: Will you do a 30 Minute Purge?

Vanessa

5 Lessons from Airbnbs

A Simpler Home, A Simpler Motherhood

Our family has been staying in Airbnbs, VRBOs, vacation rentals for awhile now. While I love a good hotel pool, Airbnbs just work better for our season of life with four young kids. Today I’m sharing some lessons I’ve learned from staying in Airbnbs when it comes to living with less. Every time we are away these lessons are at the forefront of my mind and remind me why we choose to pursue a simpler way of life. Here are my 5 Lessons from Airbnbs.

5 Lessons from Airbnbs

Lesson 1: Less clutter equals more freedom.

Each time we stay at an Airbnb there is less to care for. Less stuff to put away, less clothes to launder, less mess to pick up. Less to clean, scrub, declutter, organize, hide, etc. Most Airbnbs are sparsly decorated to leave room for the renter’s belongings. The essentials are there: things to cook with, soap and paper towels and toilet paper, furniture for watching movies and sleeping, rugs to make it cozy, and plants to liven up the space. There aren’t a million decorative signs or plates or trinkets lying around on the counters or desks. Those are left out to make room for the things needed to live life.

Every time we stay at an Airbnb, I come home wanting to declutter. Why? Because when I stay in someone else’s home with only the essentials I feel light and there is freedom in it. I want more freedom and I know that means less stuff.

Lesson 2: Keep the best.

There are almost never ratty towels in the bathroom of an Airbnb. Nor are there a million pens in the junk drawer or broken toys in the toy bin or old, forgotten trinkets on the counter. What if we decided we didn’t need those things either? What if we kept only the best towels, the pens we enjoyed using, the usable toys (see a post about toys here), the treasured trinkets on the counter? Keeping the best, the wanted, the valuable makes life a little more special, don’t you think?

Lesson 3: Use what we have.

At the beginning of a trip, we always stop at the grocery store to grab food for our stay. Bacon, eggs, butter, bread, fruit, coffee. My goal is to use up all we have before we leave. What if we did the same at home? Instead of buying more at the store or popping into Target for one or two things, what if we took a week or a month to use what we have? Use up the leftovers, thaw and use the frozen meat, eat up the snacks in the pantry before buying more. This is something I have been working on and will continue to challenge myself to use what we have.

Lesson 4: One is enough.

One good knife for cutting veggies. One television to cozy up and watch a movie together. One good skillet for frying up bacon. In an Airbnb many times one is enough. Of course there are categories where one isn’t enough. Silverware and towels and paper towels. However, I think we can make our lives simpler when we decide one is enough when it comes to certain things. Keep in mind, this will change and evolve over time.

In our current season, one television is enough for our family. In the future, that could change. Our family also lives with one set of sheets per bed. That could change as well. Where one is enough for our family, it might not be enough for your’s. Think through if there are areas in your home where one is enough.

Lesson 5: Explore and enjoy more.

Whenever we stay in an Airbnb, we are motivated and excited to get out and explore the destination. Our family goes to parks, the beach, museums. We take walks, enjoy new restaurants, and make it a priority to spend time together as a family. We don’t need to go to an Airbnb to do that. Yes, there is more work to do at home. Yes, we have commitments and priorities and schedules. But what if we also took the time to explore our communities more as a family? What if we made life more enjoyable by doing things together? Life is meant to be enjoyed so let’s take the time and enjoy more of it.

Pursuing an intentional life with less is a journey. What is one way you could live with less today?

Vanessa

Mins Game

A Simpler Home

Ready and willing to get rid of a lot of stuff? Play the Mins Game with me this September. Joshua Milllburn and Ryan Nicodemus, The Minimalists, created this game to add a little fun to the decluttering process. The game is simple. On the first day of September, declutter 1 thing. On the second day of September, declutter 2 things. The third day of September, it’s 3 things. You get the idea. The first week will be effortless for most and then things will ramp up quickly. The part that makes this game fun is playing with friends. The friend who lasts the longest, wins. So, I’m going to play and share what I’m letting go of each day and I hope some of you will join me.

Mins Game

Who’s Playing?

I am going to ask my whole family to join me in playing the Mins Game. Our crew is pretty competitive, so I’m sure I can get everyone on board.

What will be decluttered?

Anything is game! I have a room in the basement I have been meaning to get to and this game is a good motivator to get it done.

When will we declutter?

My type A personality would love for our decluttering efforts to start our day, but that isn’t realistic in our house. Most times we will find our items to declutter in the evening after dinner and before it’s time for bed.

How to donate?

Because I know my family, we will make a trip to the donation center weekly. I can’t hold onto all the decluttered stuff for a month or surely things will make it back inside our house. Anyone else?

Will you join me for the Mins Game? If we make it to the end of the month, we will have decluttered 465 things in 30 days. Follow along my decluttering journey on Instagram and share your own decluttering efforts with the hashtag #asimplermotherhoodminsgame